Way Books

Recharge in Minutes by Suzanne Zoglio, has 101 ways to rev up your focus, confidence, and energy. This book has ten easy-to-read chapters with titles and topics like Chapter 1 "I can't think straight" for finding mental focus, Chapter 3 "I'm OK...Just stuck in a rut" for revving up, Chapter 5 "I haven't got a clue" for inviting inspiration, Chapter 8:"If I'm so smart, why don't I know it" for boosting confidence, and Chapter 10 "Just my luck" for acknowledging abundance. Chapter 10 is also good for those `pity parties' and `why me' feelings.

Dr. Zoglio has done an outstanding job organizing each chapter into nine to eleven one page tips, called Quick Lifts for resolving the chapter's main issue. The chapters start with an explanation, followed by the list of the Quick Lift suggestions. Each Quick Lift has its own page with a brief statement and several action suggestions.

What I like about Recharge in Minutes is each of the 101 ways has several suggestions which are short to implement. One of Quick Lift 97, Share your bounty, suggestions is silently say a pray for someone who is facing a challenge. Another is share a funny story to someone who could use a cheer. All of the actions are quick and easy to implement and specifically designed to address the Quick Lift.

Recharge in Minutes is highly organized and efficiently written to deal with life's many problems. The 101 ways are useful for work or at home and simple to implement. It is organized and simple to reference the particular life problem and Quick Lift, making it an excellent book to keep around!

Recharge in Minutes by Suzanne Zoglio
2003. Tower Hill Press, Doylestown, PA

This excellent, short, easy-to-read book gives 101 ways to raise your mood. Most of these ideas have been advocated by many writers and experts. The strength of Recharge in Minutes is that each idea is described in a single page or less. If one is depressed, it is difficult to read a long, detailed manual about what to do. Just a few minutes with this book can boost your mood.

I have used many of these methods to battle depression. When I'm depresed, I'm confused. I don't know where I'm going. I can't see the big picture. I need to get in touch with my inner self. This book reminds me of what me in the past and tells me what will help now.

These tools put you in touch with your soul. They can help you find your destiny, what you want to get out of life, and what you want your life to have meant to the world.

Many therapists have cited the benefit of writing in a journal. Rechange in Minutes gives you many things to write about. One method is to write a "dream letter" to a friend. You are to pretend it is 2 years from now, and you are to describing your ideal life.

We used (and are still using) Recharge for our High Performance Leadership Team as a teaching/learning tool. Each member has his/her own copy (35 in all)to be used for reference. At team meetings people are sharing how they are using the many bits of advice found in Dr. Sue's wonderful book. With the reduced number of people and funds that seem to be a way of life anymore, it seemed as if our Leaders were getting sapped of their energy, trying to do more with less. Recharge opened our eyes to methods that really work... at work! We don't have to take a vacation get that recharge!

If you really want a recharge, have Dr. Sue personally deliver a mini-seminar on the subject. We did and the results are fantastic!

Reading Recharge in Minutes was an enjoyable activity since I was sitting out in the sun and that seems to "recharge" me physically. As I was introducing our new kitten to the deck, she slept happily in the sun. The scent of flowers in the planter lingered in the air and the clouds were slowly drifting by. "This is more of what I need in life," I thought.

This book will not only help you reduce stress in your life, it will also only take less than an hour to read. With pen in hand, I jotted down ideas like:

Instead of running away from home, sit out in the sun more often...
Stop the stress response through more exercise!
Goal: read one book a day or more if possible
Morning Intent - Decide to bless lives on a daily basis or make a difference instead of just making a "to do" list.
Eat more Belgium chocolate!
Listen to Thunderstorm CD while taking long baths...oh and buy more candles.
Decrease contact with energy sappers...
Avoid whirlpools of negativity!

Suzanne Zoglio also encourages you to write out your dreams. Where do you want to be in a year? What will you be doing? Where will you be living? Her book encourage you to solve the unsolvable, calm yourself down in times of stress (breathing techniques), take risks and find out what is important.

If you have noticed that your energy is often connected to your emotions, this book will be enlightening in that regard. Your emotional well being is very connected to your energy and just being around positive people can make you feel more energetic.

We all know that unmanaged stress is a major health risk. If you want more peace, passion and purpose, Suzanne Zoglio has ideas for being more assertive and setting boundaries. After reading this book I made an appointment for a facial. Life is short, the spa awaits.

~The Rebecca Review

Dr. Zoglio continues to inspire and provide new approaches to addressing daily challenges and opportunities. I have read this book several times and find myself applying the concepts across all areas of my life from the office to home and in re-creational activities. I consciously call on those Recharging 'minutes' if my enthusiasm or energy is waning in a situation - and I readily get my game face back. I'm using the ideas in this book as tools and as weapons. The book is clear and as always you can appreciate Dr. Zoglio's innovative style and ability to convey the message.
I also went back to the shelf and re-read Tickle Your Soul - the book that left me waiting for this one.

I don't have children of my own, but I bought this book because I thought it would be helpful knowledge to have when dealing with my nieces and nephews. I was surprised to find that these skills aren't just for kids. These are basic human relationship skills that will work for anyone. I wish more adults understood and applied this type of healthy interaction. Perhaps this book will lay the groundwork for a more kind and self-assured generation to come. I recommend this book for everyone. It's not just for children.

Scott Cooper's book, STICKS AND STONES, is an excellent resource for anyone who wants to improve interpersonal relations at home, in the classroom among children or even in a marriage or between countries. This small, completely accessible and easy-to-read book is organized into chapters that illustrate skills by linking them to the patterns of common birds. for example, for problems dealing with blaming (The Way of the Crow) skills such as the "Mighty Might" can be learned and utilized on the spot. Scripts enlarge the concepts and are written in kid-friendly language.

Although this book abounds with good psychological principles, the author comes across as a positive coach with a humorous and compassionate style. The material and strategies are easy to grasp and draw upon solid psychological research, but are not heavy with jargon. Scott Cooper's wisdom will help fill in gaps in your own experience as a child.

Every teacher and principal should have a copy near by. I have recommended this book to many adults in my social work practice. I wish it was around when I was raising a family.

I have read quite a few books on assertiveness training in order to help my 7 year old deal with teasing from her peers. I must have read about 15 different books, but this book truly stands out. It's not just a bunch of hogwash about how teasing affects self esteem, etc, etc. It's real life, practical techniques easy enough to teach a 7 year old that will give her the tools she needs in dealing with the stuff 7 year olds all have to deal with. Each chapter in the book deals with a different concept to work on. So I'm teaching my daughter a chapter a week so that when she re-enters school in September, she'll be much better prepared.

This book is great. Kids need it! It gave my kids the actual lines they can say when they are being teased. One of the nice surprises is that it also gave me ways to help my kids deal with the whiny, exaggerated things they tell themselves. My kids use the phrases in the book and now they know what to say automatically.This has given them a lot of confidence. They feel much better in many different situations.

Let me say first that I have not read this particular book, but have a comment to make regarding destructive teasing.

My 11 year old was teased unmercifully last year by a group of kids after he stood up for a younger child that was the "class goat". (This book was not available; I would have used it if it had been). Suffice it to say that visits to the principal, the teachers, etc. yielded sympathy but no protection.

We finally got him a couple of books of insults and he practiced them at home. He got to be really good at the funny comeback, the creative snap.

It wasn't our favorite solution, but it did work. He's even popular this year because kids think it's funny. The teasing has lessened, though no one at this age is totally immune. At least he didn't slug anybody and he's getting some relief from the incessant comments.

So if the "turn the other cheek" approach isn't working, buy a few insult books and see if you can make the best defense a good offense.

This is a great first book in stocks. Before reading this book I didn't know what questions to ask or where to begin investing in the stock market. I especially like this book's ground up approach
1) providing motivation to invest
2) defining stock jargon
3) introducing professional tools and resources

The rest of the book introduces investing strategy, stock analysis, economic trends, and many many other details. I like how the author doesn't seem to be pushing an agenda, but just introducing the tools to be used by both aggressive and conservative investors.

This was my first "stock" book I bought. I was not disappointed. The book gave me some excellent suggestions on how to pick stocks. Author stressed on doing fundamental analyses before choosing any stock. The language and format of the book is very user friendly. I, however, dont agree with the rapid screening method given in the book. I tried to apply that method to more than a dozen stocks ranked by Zack's at #1, But the method rejected them all!. Either the Zack's are not doing good job or there is something wrong with the method. Overall the book is an excellent resource for beginners and intermediate investors.

I was a novice to the financial markets before I read this book. I have successfully used the ideas and principles in this book to improve my investment criteria, and feel much more confident about success in the stock market.

This book provides information about technical and fundametal analysis.It is written in a clear way. I would recommend this book to my friends.

This book is tremendous! It is a very easy read and provides great insight into investing in the stock market. I highly recommend this book for anyone who is interested in the stock market but does not have a lot of stock picking experience.

A very detailed look into the life of an iconoclast. This is a truly deep dive into, not only the life of Story Musgrave, but his philosophies and methodologies toward living life the way you want. It stares into hardships unflinchingly and takes the viewer into space with the proper sense of anticipation and awe.

A very great read presented in an original and entertaining manner. Not your typical biography.

I thoroughly enjoyed "Story, the Way of Water". It is a gripping book that keeps you riveted to the development of Story's life as he overcomes the problems he encountered. The book gives a clear picture of his strong character, intelligence, and robustness. The great part of the book is that
it conveys his feelings as he accomplished the many great tasks he set out to do. Using those that knew him to help tell his story was truly magnificent. I picked up the book and could not put it down until I finished it.

This is a biography with a difference about a man whose lifetime achievements are incredible; leaving school unqualified, obtaining multiple degrees, more hours on the T38 jet than any other human being, astronaut, multiple spaceflights, multiple space walks, poet etc.
As well as the straight biography you get quotes and writings from Story himself. Somehow he seems to view the world differently from other people.
A really good read but enough to make even the highest achiever seem like a bit of a failure!

This book is the first major work by a young author. It has been written with passion, based on incredible research. This book is both educational and motivational as you witness Story's persistent efforts leading to extraordinary achievements. You are encouraged to follow his example in some small way in your own environment.

A very thoroughly and thoughtfully researched chronicle of the life of an iconoclast. Story is a unique person even among his peers. Anne Lenehan captured far more than the typical celebrity biography!

You will refer to this book over and over on any extended cruise on Lake Superior. Well organized with clear and straightforward information on many locations.

March 22, 2001 Obviously this is not a review. I've been searching everywhere for this book without sucess. Please if you have an extra copy you would be willing to part with send me an e-mail MJBahr007@aol.com Thank you! P.S. I'm planning on bringing my 26' sailboat with a crew of 3 or 4 to the Apostle Islands the first week in August 2001. If anyone else that reads this is going to be up there during this period of time please feel free to send me an e-mail and maybe we can raft up some evening and swap dinner and tales! It does not matter if you are a power or sailboater all are welcome!

Now in a completely updated and expanded third edition, Bonnie Dahl's Superior Way continues to be the premier cruising guide to Lake Superior for recreational sailors and their onboard guests. A definitive and detailed guide to cruising Lake Superior, this superbly presented guide offers more than 350 new GPS Waypoints, information on improved harbor passages,. as well as new marinas and anchorages. Enhanced with more than 300 diagrams, charts and tables, this "user friendly" volume is spiral bound allowing it to be laid out flat next to the helm. If you are planning a cruise anywhere on Lake Michigan, whether as an afternoon's outing or for an extended vacation, begin your preparations and planned itinerary with acquiring your own copy of Bonnie Dahl's Superior Way!

Cruising Surperior has always been a goal for my husband and myself. Three years ago I bought 5 copies of the book for ourselves and friends. We studied and planned and charted Superior the first year. The book gave us a very detailed description of approaches, anchorages, bottom holding, alternative anchorages depending on wind. We found our first summer 1999 sailing Superior a very rewarding experience and in a large way "Superior Way" gave us the confidence to approach seemingly unapproachable anchorages. In many instances we seemed familiar with the areas, having read, studied Bonnie's book. We circumnavigated Superior that year and vowed to return in 2000. We did and again Bonnie Dahl's book was invaluable. We are going again in 2001. Lake Superior is a formidable lake by many accounts but having good Navigation skills and equipment, charts and Bonnie's book; Your experience will be the highlight of your cruising experience for years to come. Motor or Sail - - BUY THE BOOK!!

I write articles for boating magazines and frequently rely upon other sources of information just to be able to go out and research new material. This book is the only absolutely essential resource for those who go out on Lake Superior.

Picked it up based on the ridiculous cover and it hit the spot.... Hilarious in spots, insightful in others... a book about a part of one gay man's journey that has relevance for all of us.

Kudos to Mr. Derfner ;)

Swish is an excellent book, well-written and moving. It is considerably darker than you might expect, given the title and the author's previous book--Derfner's life story includes a dying mother and struggles with mental illness. Nonetheless Swish is well-leavened with humor and packed with insight.

Is Swish funny? It's hilarious.

Is it about life as a gay man? Yup.

But that's really not the whole story. The heart of the book - for me - was about Joel's mother. His relationship with her, the way he tries to reconcile his love with the terrible things they experienced together (and that she said) broke my heart.

This is a very grown-up book. It's the kind of book where no one's really that great, much less perfect, but everyone receives a fair share of compassion from our gentle narrator.

This is that rarest of things: an honest book.
And that makes it a beautiful one.

I read a review of "Swish" and it sounded intriguing, so I picked it up even though, as a heterosexual woman, I'm well aware that I'm not the target audience for the book. And you know what? I found myself identifying with Joel anyway. He's neurotic, an outsider -- and also manages to be completely hilarious and insightful in a way most of us can only dream about. Reading "Swish" is like spending a few hours in the company of a fascinating and funny person, and if you're straight, even if you have gay friends and/or relatives, you're likely to come away with a better understanding of what it means to be a gay man in 2008.

This book is a must read!!!

After reading it the first time, I went back and re-read several of the chapters two to three more times. Each time, something new, something hidden, something waiting is evoked.

The words contained in this book really do radiate something very ancient and very powerful through the history, the knowledge, and the humor.

One of the best books I've ever come across. Teachings of a Toltec Survivor is a tool for every serious person on the path of self-realization and a doorway for any being who wishes to enter initiation and thus begin their magical journey. A good start for anybody just on the curious side.
When I began to read this book, it was apparent to me from the very start that it does not contain any fluff for the serious student. Full of knowledge, history, legend and folklore, Toltec "survivor" Koyote takes you into the very center of the esoteric teachings of the Toltec. Every chapter is a potential lesson, complete with both proven and experimental exercises for anyone to try. Koyote also shares some powerful techniques that are usually meant for the initiated or the serious student.
This book is not Koyote's own writings. It is actually the offspring of an intensive class by Koyote which lasted three months. Thirty-something students signed-up for it, most of them made it to the end. The classes were video taped and recorded and typed on the spot. The material was collected and arranged in an almost as-is style. Notes from Koyote's students were checked against the video for accuracy. All was made in a hasty way to comply with deadlines, and the book was published.
In this book you will find many keys which are valuable for anybody who is looking for the Work. In this book you will find exercises which are designed to trigger experience which is hidden from us by the powers that be. It is not hocus-pocus type of stuff, but simple techniques which have simply been hidden away from the masses.
Now, it is said that true knowledge doesn't come from a book, and I believe that. This book has what is necessary for you to begin the exploration of a hidden self. This book is a very practical tool if used in a practical way, that is, if it is used as an experimentation. Do the exercises and see what happens.
This book can also be effective in group situations, and in fact, it will more likely than not be more effective if used that way. Gather a group of friends and/or relatives that are interested in self-exploration, awakening, transformation, the occult, esoteric, hidden knowledge, etc. Meet once a week, consistently, to read a chapter a week. Go over the exercise and do it, practice it during the following days until you meet again. Then you can discuss, share experience, ask questions, etc., and always keep a journal!
This book is also just full of facts and information on, from, and of that ancient society, from spiritual practices to social and political data and history and legend. This book is also fun to read and it is full of Koyote's jokes, which, as he constantly states, is where the Teaching is contained.
If nothing more, this book is a key. Forget the words that are in here. Forget the exercises and the esoteric teachings and the forgotten formulas - they are not real! Just a possibility...
What is real is a physical copy of the book itself...a possible crystallization of Koyote's teaching itself...a map to a living Teacher on the path to Mastery. If you don't believe me, just skip to the very last page and see!

I encountered Koyote the Blind's _Teachings of a Toltec Survivor_ when I edited it. Although it is irregular for the editor of a book to review it, the experience was so unusual I wish to share some of it.

The material in this book on what has been called in the West "the Great Work" is taken from Koyote's orally delivered teachings. Although I had attended the extemporaneous lectures of Koyote from which the book is taken, I was unprepared to discover that the lectures (chapters) relate to one another as an organic tapestry. From the ancient roots of spiritual evolution in the three-layered temples to the Pyramid of the Sun to fractals to esoteric Christianity, the text behaves as a seemingly complex but ultimately simple expansion of a theme. For me and for others I have talked to, the result is a book you can read over and over again without it ever seeming to be the same. A slight variation in my state renders the experience of reading the book astonishingly new.

_Teachings of a Toltec Survivor_ contains esoteric and Toltec oral history, practical exercises, exposition of esoteric philosophy, and (the real Teachings) jokes! I feel a physical charge run through my body when I read this book. Synchronicity increases. There is something strange about it.

Historians, particularly those of the Fourth Way, will appreciate the documentation of students' and apprentices' experiences, captured in comments and a panel discussion. You can watch as the weird experience of being in that classroom (reflected in nonordinary shifts in temperature, mood, lighting, pressure) disarm the defense mechanisms of those present. How do different personality types (as for example those in the Enneagram scheme) cope with the strains of real spiritual experiences? Read and see!

I wish to make it known that I worked on this book entirely as a service to the Work. I was awed and would not give up the experience for any amount of money. Sometimes you know that magic has happened.

Teachings of a Toltec Survivor is a powerful tool for those who are on the path of self-realization. The knowledge conveyed in this book is practical, inspirational and yes, at times, offensive. It is unlike anything I have come across. It cuts through our social conditioning and dogmatic beliefs to awaken within us that which is unseen by the human eye.

I was actually a very fortunate participant in the lectures that make up this book. I haven't even read the whole book from cover to cover, but I have done flip opens from it and I will tell you that every page has something to say! This is not just a book it is a tool to help unlock something that is eternal within.

Sometimes offensive and often funny it speaks to each person differently yet the same at the same time. I didn't have any Toltec knowledge previously, but felt the teachings familiar from a place within that I only seem to be able to touch when Truth is being spoken.

Oh, I wanted to be offended and walk out a couple times during these lectures, but that something that I have been speaking of kept me planted in my seat and I was never sorry I stayed. This book transforms. You will come away from it different and not in a "good" way, but in a real way.

If you are a truth seeker don't miss it. If you just want to feel good likely not the book for you. If you want to laugh check it out, but don't be fooled by the jokes there is teaching there as well.

Thank you for reading my review of this awesome book.

Marta

To Hell and Back, by Gail Kauranen Jones, is insightful, authentic and a teaching tool that helps individuals facing their own life transitions. Gail's journey through her own transitions affect us all; the chapter titles are easy-to-relate to as she shares her own experiences with us: Changing Careers, Becoming a Mother, Parenting the Parents and Coping with Death. I look forward to a sequel on Marriage and Parenting Pre-Teens. I loved the introductory quotes from leading authors in the field of transitions and the "how to tips" that are highlighted throughout the text. A well-written, easy-to-read format, also enhances Gail's ultimate "gift" to reach-out and share her most intimate feelings with you. Her candidness and open invitation to her evolving world makes you want to read more of her ongoing life transitions.

Gail's book doesn't just talk about the feelings and thoughts that we experience during major life transitions; she puts sidebars with very specific prescriptive recommendations on what you can do. I think that's what sets this book apart from many that explore inner struggle. The book is 1/3 deep, personal diary; 1/3 "this is how it made me feel"; and 1/3 "if you felt this too, then do A, B, and C to get through it."

I am impressed with the author's candid, vulnerable, and honest exploration of her own struggles and willingness to expose her own weak moments to others, so that they can learn from them. Only a strong, self-assured person can use their own dark moments as a teaching tool for others. I think Gail has done it well.

After reading this book in just one sitting (for fear of not having the time to pick it up again), I can not wait to pass it on to my friends and family. I have always thought of myself as lucky for not having to deal with hardships or trauma like many of those around me. I used to believe in the mantra, "That will never happen to me." As I have gotten older, things have started to happen to me. I have seen friends lose their loved ones. I have "parented a parent" after surgery and watched as hard working and motivated friends have lost the jobs they thought would last a lifetime. This book not only taught me strategies to deal with these life changes; it also reminded me to live in the moment and appreciate and embrace transition. As I continue my journey through life's expected and unexpected transitions, I will use this book as a reference and an inspiration.

"To Hell and Back" is a must read for any adult in transition. As a Financial Advisor working with clients enduring and planning for career changes, retirements, births, and deaths I see true value in Gail's insights. Most importantly this book helps us understand transition as a process and evolution that is in many ways inevitable. In a rapidly changing world we must learn to embrace change and understand our feelings and role in the process of change. "To Hell and Back" is the textbook for achieving this necessary understanding and the fulfilling life and happiness that is the direct result of building a well balanced career and family life.

Gail Jones takes the reader on a journey through four major transitions in her life: finding vocation, motherhood, eldercare, and the death of her father. The book's title, To Hell and Back, is apt: Jones has been there; the raw emotions of her responses to these life changes permeate her story. She invites the reader to stand with her in pain, despair, loneliness, frustration, and rage. Jones isn't afraid to touch these tender places in courage and honesty. In bringing a light into her own darkness, she shines a beacon for others to follow.

But as she gives voice to the hurt, she also chooses freedom. The richness of the book lies in her story of self-understanding, empowerment, and self-love; her road back is the path to heaven. Transition is a deeply personal and unique experience that offers the opportunity to unfold into wholeness. Jones honors grief as a transformative energy and shows the reader how to take time to grieve and to let go, to face emptiness and uncertainty with strength and make a new life from nothing else but the creative power of love.

While Jones advocates reflection and diving deep into the psyche to process transition, she also warns against isolation and offers helpful advice for building support through community for the journey. While intensely reflective, the book is also richly pro-active and offers helpful advice throughout for creatively dealing with change.

To men: while the book is about a woman's experience, her journey is essentially human and crosses gender boundaries. There is something magical about the disclosure of the feminine that also illuminates the masculine. Read this book as a guide for help with your own transitions and for supporting the life changes of the women in your life.

I just recently started reading this book and must say I am "blown away" by the simple truth is states. I have been on a spiritual journey for some time, fueled by the need to find out what is really real. I've come to the conclusion that the journey never ends, there are always levels to accend too. The higher you go - the easier it gets. There are a lot of great spiritual works out there. A Course In Miracles, Conversations With God, and many others I have read and have helped me on this journey. They all teach the same truth in the end, for the truth is the same. This little book does it in such a direct way that it has made an enormous impact on me. I do feel you have to be ready to accept it though, and depending on where you are on that acceptance continuum will affect the impact this book has on your life. For me, its just what I needed at this stage, and I highly recommend it.

Shame on all the booksellers selling this ten dollar book for $75 and up!
Devorss is re-publishing this book in August!
I took note of the sellers AND WILL NEVER BUY FROM THEM!

The message of this book is very profound.The author speaks about many topics .I want to mention one of the concepts .I was really impressed by the words " Whatever you hold in consciousness , will manifest into your body and affairs" . This reminds me of Paramahansa Yogananda( His Autobiography of a Yogi is a classic ) 's words " If you hold onto an idea with dynamic will power ; it finally assumes a tangible outward form" .

Most people have stacked up negative beliefs about life and themselves which take an outward form due to holding onto those beliefs. Many smokers hold onto the idea that they cannot quit and they prove themselves right over and over. Or people who are poor hold onto the idea that they can never get over their conditions and prove themselves correct . Or men losing hair hold onto the idea of baldness with such fear that they help in manifesting the very condition they dont want.

Now I want to mention one specific way to hold an idea in your consciousness. Many people have read about Scott Adams ( creator of Dilbert ) and his experiences with affirmations. He says that one can achieve a lot in life by using affirmations.An example affirmations is " I John Doe will get rich by investing in stocks " to get rich via stocks. One has to write it fifteen times in a row daily till the goal is fulfilled. You will experience coincidences of such nature that your desire manifests itself.
He picked two stocks that were the best stocks of that year.Who told him what stocks to pick ? The answer lies in a small book that has been in print over 75 years. It is IT WORKS by R.H.Jarrett. In this book ( It works - RHJ ) the author says that a mighty power in man which he calls God in man can guide you to accomplish any goal that you wish to be fulfilled.But you must be really earnest about it.

Try these concepts for yourself and prove whether these concepts are true or not.Good Luck.

Awesome. If you have heard that "still small voice", this may be helpful. Highly recommended.

Awesome book. If you want to "change"...here you go.

I'm not a literary type, but when my parents announced that after 39 years of marriage they were divorcing, I had feelings I was unsure of how to deal with. I was actually at the hair salon, reading one of their magazines when I found the review of this book. It was exactly what I needed to read. I'm almost to the end of the book, but things that I said to my friends and family BEFORE I read the book, were right there in black and white. I was happy to see that I wasn't alone in my feeling about the divorce. It helped me tremendously to read and endorsed my feeling. As soon as I'm finished, I'm going to give it to my Brother, then to my Husband, then maybe mom and dad should get a copy for Christmas or something. Thanks Brooke!

My parents recently separated & are getting a divorce after 34 years of marriage. My father had an affair with a much younger woman for over a year. I never thought I would have to deal with such a huge change in our family, but I did. And reading this book helped me through it. Honestly, once I was done reading it I saw things differently and it truly helped me get a grip on the way things will NOW be. I highly highly recommend this book to anyone feeling lost and not sure where to turn. I took comfort in knowing this has happened to others and how they chose to deal with it.

WOW...I read this book with such enthralled interest and found myself nodding through so much of it because it fully validated all I have felt in the 12 1/2 years since I learned my parents' nearly 29-year marriage was ending.

Let me first say to anyone considering "staying together for the kids" that you seriously reconsider! Not only is there NO evidence that waiting until the kids are adults makes it less painful, but as many of the interviewees in the book attest, it makes the marriage seem to be a sham, and if the disenchantment with it is made known to the kids after they're grown, particularly if all appeared to be well, we end up questioning all we thought we had learned from it. I had always thought my parents were happy together. They never fought in front of us, and we always saw them make up. I was actually proud to have parents who appeared to be in love with each other after years and years--the way my husband and I are--only to find out from my mother when she left my dad for his best friend that she didn't think she had EVER really been in love with him! I had only been married for 4 years by then myself, and it crushed me. I began to question my own identity because of all the lies that suddenly came to light.

The other thing I wrestled with was the timing. I had just learned I was pregnant with my second child and had just had a crisis with a lifelong chronic health condition. Mom, who had always been so protective of me, chose THAT TIME to leave my father! She also lied many times to me about what she had planned to do, and perhaps predictably, I became extremely sick and battled one thing after another through my entire pregnancy. Brooke Foster validated for me what I have always wondered: whether all the stress from the split, as well as all the pleas and fights over whose "side" I should be on contributed to the demise of my health during that time. I'm sure now that it did, and since my son was subsequently diagnosed with autism, I am sad to say that I can't dismiss the role of the divorce as contributing to it.

I'm relieved to say I have a great relationship with both of my parents now, and even my mom's husband (sorry; can't say "stepfather"! I was 28 when they married!), and I have moved on from all of the anger and hurt I felt about it, but it does change who you are and how you think about your own relationships. When I find that my husband and I squabble about the same things over and over again, I worry that the cycle is beginning again, so even if you get to the point of being "over it," it can have a lasting--perhaps even lifelong--influence over you in some way. If you need to leave a lousy marriage, do, by all means, but please don't stay on account of your kids, because I can assure you that they will have other problems as a result.

If you are looking for a book that reassures you that you aren't (or haven't been) overreacting to your parents' divorce, this is the book to read, from someone who has "been there and done that." Please pick it up. It is definitely worth the read.

10-years ago my wife ended a 32-year marriage. She said she had not loved me for years but would not divorce me until the children were on their own and married. She said that she didn't believe that I would take care of my children financially. Oh how wrong she was. My son has not spoken to me in years. He will not acknowledge telephone calls, letters, gifts, birthdays and holidays. Brooke Leas Foster has written a wonderful book about adult children of divorce. I have always believed that it was harder on ACOD than it was on younger children for all the various reasons cited in Brooke's book. As a result of having read The Way They Were from my children's prespective I have ordered the book for my daughter. I hope that she will also share it with my son. The "guilt" that I felt as a Dad has been lifted as a result of this book. I highly recommend to any parent of adult children contemplating divorce. A must read for all. Thank you Brooke. Well done.

I really enjoyed reading this and for once I was able to identify with someone else's feeling about their parents' divorce. So many divorces seem to happen when children are young and we, as ACOD, have vastly different experiences than them.

I recognized so many emotions in this book and I am so glad to finally hear that I am not alone in these. Having your sense of security snatched away when you're a young adult that's new to independence can almost retard emotional growth.

The one thing that I would have liked to have seen portrayed in this book is the "nightmare" behaviors that one can experience as an adult child of divorce - whether that behavior is coming from the parent's new partner or whether they are coming from within one's self as the pain and anguish really starts to come to the surface. A lot of us dealt with this stuff in less than healthy ways - a bit of decadent behavior perhaps - and I would have liked to have read a bit more discussion on that. Not all of us dealing with divorces were drink-free, drug-free, straight A students with the ability to sit down and rationalize our behaviors and our experiences are just as valid. It would have been nice to have seen that side represented.

I guess for that reason alone I would have given it four stars. But because it's the first book on divorce that made me feel like other people understood it remains at a five.