Tasteless Books

My husband and I read this book in 1970. I don't remember what caused us to buy it, but we were newlyweds and we took turns reading it out loud which caused both of us to laugh hysterically. My favorite parts included the gentle horse for scared kids (the horse was dead and surrounded by flies) and the camp nurse that confided that she wasn't a nurse. Her mother named her Nurse and people just assumed that she was a nurse. She had brothers with names like President, Senator, and Reverend. I wish I still had my copy, but I loaned it to a friend and she lost it...probably never even read it. I wonder why this book isn't printed again? I refuse to pay several hundred dollars for a used paperbook copy even though I have never read another book as funny as this one.

this book is amazing...an irreverant Separate Peace, the ultimate Jewish coming of age book; that's why I have 2 copies, a paperback and a hardback! Someday I may part with them, but they are just too funny...just wish I could use parts with my students...but "I don't think so, not in the South anyway!"

I first got the book while attending San Fernando Valley State, Bill "Higgie Iggie", Higgins gave it to me. That was back in 1969! Hope you're still out there Bill. Took it with me to University of Heidelberg in Germany where it made its rounds there then it got passed on to some students at the Universidy of Berlin. I thought I'd never get it back. It finally did come back my second year there and it is now locked in my safe. I'll never let it go now! Truely a classic. After reading this how can anyone not laugh at life?! My only wish is that it were longer. Way too short, didn't want it to end. Get your hands on this one if you can.......

I didn't know who the author was, but every so often I'd type in "The Horse is Dead" into a search engine. I finally found it at Alibris, but they want 203 and 268 dollars for it.

I'm going to start hitting used bookstores. This book is a classic, and got me through a very trying time during my youth. I'm reminded of the book everytime I see that camp movie made with Bill Murray. Clearly, it's not as good as the book, though

Johanna

I read this book back in the early 70's, and I still laugh if I see something that remotely reminds me of this book, it could be at the swimming pool where a kid is too afraid to jump in, or at a baseball game when someone slides into second plate. If you've read this book, you know exactly what I'm talking about. If you can get your hands on a copy, you've got a real treasure. I wish I still had my copy, I'd pay dearly to have another.

I am so glad I found this book! It is funny, it is entertaining, odd, ... A great present for somebody who has already everything.

I love this book. I entertained myself and my sister-in-law by reading some of the lists aloud, especially the ones that pertain to death. This book is twisted humor at its very best.

I love this book. I entertained myself and my sister-in-law by reading some of the lists aloud, especially the ones that pertain to death. This book is twisted humor at its very best.

This is a very interesting book. You'll be so entertained when reading this thing that you won't realize what else you're doing... learning history! Yep.. a lot of this book is about scandalous things of the past.
I would suggest this book to any and everyone (as long as they're over a certain age. Some of it might not be appropriate for younger kids, but I doubt they'd even WANT to read this book.)
Read about people who met their deaths while sitting on the toilet or having sex! Learn about how much fly feces is in your candy bar! Most of all, have FUN with this book. It's really thick, so it should keep you entertained for quite awhile.

This is the one you read before going to a party!!
A Hilariously funny - and nasty.

I can't even put it in words how brilliant this book is it's a mastepiece!!! I've read this book so often that I can't keep the count and I never get bored of it. Blanche Knott is a genius =)

Don't be fooled into buying a no-name joke book. Trust this one, one of the best

Well, I a just have that kind of humor that I enjoy looking at alone. Very funny if you are into this.

The best of all the (very good) National Lampoon cartoon books

It was so funny I just about fell on the floor laughing. the pictures are great.

You remember doing it. Laughing so hard the milk came out your nose? Now either that was a long time ago or you are probably still under 10 years old. When I picked up this almost innocent-looking book, I had no idea I would be snorting and giggling like I was an 8 year old sharing silly jokes at a birthday party.

There are certain books that you come across in life that you share and recommend, and there are others that you just take into the bathroom, sit, and read. This book you could share in the bathroom. Well, that is what happened with me, anyway. I just couldn't help but read these side-splitting, terribly tasteless fortunes with someone nearby, no matter where I was.

While the fortunes are truly tasteless, they are mostly G or at worst PG rated.

While the book isn't very long (maybe two trips to the John), it is very funny. I suspect there will be a run on these for Christmas, because the price is right too, and it's a gift book that anyone would be glad to get that likes to laugh.

Joe Wang is a genius. Who would have thought to make fortunes that you would hate to get? Joe WANG! Even the guy's name is funny.

These fortunes aren't just you will lose the lottery -- it's more like the catheter is cold all the time. Implying that you will need a catheter AND that it will be cold.

This is a great book to read aloud to your friends and pass around school instead of working. Just don't laugh to hard or your teacher will take the book and read aloud to the class. But maybe that'd be the plan.

Well, I bought this gorgeous book in Ljubljana's publishing house at the end of 1995 for my close firend who is M.D. (for a Christmas' gift - very convenient). I waited for it for about three months because they ordered it from one London's bookstore but all the troubles were worth it. My friend and I both read this book and we sure had some good laugh... Though I sort of expected that he wouldn't be that moralistic about certain issues... I always thought that MDs are used to EVERYTHING (ya know, what I mean, hm?). However, we both rate this book very high and since it has been bought it passed through MANY MANY hands. Perhaps you will also hear from these readers soon!Too bad that this book isn't available right now. I'm thinking about buying some more issues since I have many friends in white... and I would like to have my own issue as well!Many thanks to Blanche Knott, she did a wonderful job

Hey! Jerkface! Get your neck out of that noose!

The underground Internet sensation, J. Andrew Haknort, is finally available for your Kindle reader thingy, so you don't have to kill yourself!

What? Haven't heard of the Woobie Award winning poetry of Haknort?

He was voted the worst poet in history, by people who vote for things like that, probably when they should be working instead of screwing around with Internet polls. Your boss knows you slack off. He's got a little tracker bot on your computer, so he sees how often you check your Facebook page. He's also got a spy cam in the washroom.

Where were we? Oh yeah. The ebook.

This ebook collection of over one thousand short, terrible, offensive, vulgar, dirty, politically incorrect bad poems and awful jokes is just the thing to brighten up your miserable life.

Unless you're easily offended. Then you shouldn't buy this. Spend your money on something better for your soul. Like meth. Or bullets.

But... if you can handle extreme bad taste, and you're the type of person who has a bunch of goofy friends who like to get drunk and play "handtool dodgeball," then this may be the book you've been searching for your whole miserable life.

This ebook contains hundreds and hundreds of hilariously awful jokes and gut busting poems. Plus it's fat free. And it makes you more attractive. And it cures warts.

It's funny. Not funny like your Aunt Zelda, who your parents put in a home because she thought the squirrels were plotting against her. This ebook is haha funny.

In fact, this is 100% guaranteed to make you wet your pants laughing. If you don't wet your pants, we'll send someone over to wet them for you.

Come on! Buy it already! You got something better to do with your pocket change? Maybe head on over to the vending machine for a little snack action? Save yourself an angioplasty, chubbo, and spend your lousy buck on this book instead.

Or maybe you're thinking of saving your pennies for the jukebox. If so, you're probably over 50. Jukebox? Get an iPod, Gramps! Join the 21st century!

The fact is, there isn't a single thing you can spend your money on that will give you more enjoyment than this crappy little ebook poetry collection. Except maybe feeder mice. They get so freaked-out when you drop them in the aquarium with your pet snake, and they run around all scared, but where are you going to run, little Mr. Mouse? You're stuck in an aquarium! You can see through the walls of your glass prison but you can't escape!

Snakes are cool.

If you took all the snakes in the world, and laid them all end to end, it would probably take a lot of time.

About this ebook:

We're not telling you anything else that will be helpful. Other than the fact that this is CHEAP.

Let's face it. Ebooks SHOULD be cheap. It's not like they're being printed, and shipped, and sold at a bookstore, with every Johnny Middle Man and Suzie Retailer taking their cut.

Ebooks are a bunch of ones and zeros. They cost nothing to produce or send. So why the hell are some bestselling authors charging $11.99 for a Kindle version? Aren't they rich enough yet? How many Porsches do you need, writer boy?

They should GIVE THE BOOKS AWAY FOR FREE!

But no one ever listens to us...

Contents:

Contents? Why should we list the contents here? You want life handed to you gift-wrapped on a sesame seed bun with an extra side of money? Click on the SEND SAMPLE NOW button, you lazy goof. There's your contents.

About the author:

J. Andrew Haknort was a beat poet. He got beat a lot. Ha! Ha!

Then he died, and now we're making fat bank off of his legacy. Don't give us that look. You'd do it too if you thought of it first.

A portion of the proceeds from the sale of this ebook go to a good cause. But don't get up on your high horse there, John Wayne. It's not a large portion. It's not even half.

In fact, it's no proceeds at all. But it wasn't a good cause anyway.

I believe I first read this book, or one of the others in the "Totally Tasteless" collection, quite a few years back. My brother's girlfriend owned two of them. I used to read them every once in a while. My mother wouldn't really have cared, even though I was about 7 or 8 years old. I would really just like to say this book is absolutley funny, although I would NOT recommend letting a child read it because it is of extremeley high content of Sexuality and Other gross things and the children will probably not 'get it' anyway.

I like books like this, but it wasn't exactly what I had hoped for. I would've liked it more if the chapters could have had more on each topic (some topics only had maybe a half a page to the most on the subject), and maybe less wise-crack humor (some sounded like the author was trying too hard to make a joke). Other than that there were some things that i did find myself giggling about, and i also found some things quite fascinating and even a bit disgusting lol. All-in-all I'd give it 3 1/2 *'s.

Yes some of it was gross and interesting, but otherparts were just plain dumb. Not worth the money...borrow it from a friend.

This book was a hoot! It was truly disgusting, and I loved every minute of it. Hilarious. At times you may feel a little sick, but you'll get over it. Highly recommended.

This is one of those conversation starter books. A great book to add to the toilet library. I read this in a day (on the couch not in the powder room) and it was great!!! Very funny and kind of gross when you consider the truth behind it!

This book is a must have for those of you with a cast iron stomach.
There are topics covered here that will, I'm sure, gross out and
repel some folks. I happened to love everyone of them. This book
is a treasure to have.

This book is easy to read and often funny. It covers a lot of what Photoshop Elements can do but is very basic in nature. It gives you the basic ideas of what you can do with Elements but often does not expand on how to go further. Its big learning suggestion is to play with the different features to see what they can do.

After reading this book and the user guide that came with Elements, I have just a fair understanding of what I can do with Elements and how to do it. Elements is a very powerful photo editor.

I recently discovered and had the opportunity to browse a book titled "The Photoshop Elements Book for Digital Photographers". This book appears to be a good supplement to the two books above. It shows you things like how to remove facial blotches and to turn a smirk in to smile, among many other practical and useful things.

In Totally Tasteless Photoshop Elements Wally Wang, a highly informative and witty writer accessibly illustrates just how to digitally enhance and manipulate photographs. In a step-by-step instructional which is an ideal introduction for the novice (and with a great deal to offer even the more experienced Photoshop user), Wang shows how his readers can express their deepest secrets and fantasies artistically, clean-up dirty pictures, erase bad memories, make themselves look younger and thinner, and perform other tricks.

After reading tons and tons of technical books for Photoshop, this has got to be the most entertaining one yet. Being a designer for a newspaper, this book has opened up a whole new world of satire for me. My associate who teaches a design class in Portland read it once and decided to use it for his Photoshop class.

The instructions are easy and maintainable, unlike all those other dry humorless books. The illustrations are pretty damn funny also (I love the gorilla/strip dancer photo!).

I hope to see more from Wally Wong in the future.

I wasn't sure what to expect, but this is really a good Photoshop book for beginners. It is really well written, extremely funny. I chuckled every page I read.

Knowing next to nothing about Photoshop Elements, this book really helped. The humor throughout the book was great because it wasn't just another mind-numbing technical manual that goes from introductory to a Ph.D. level of understanding by the third chapter.

The use of humor throughout the book made it fun to read. It's one of the few "computer/software" books I've read front to back.

But along with the humor, is a lot of good instruction and information about using Photoshop Elements.