Aging Books

Very informative and enlightening read. The writers argue that retirement from paid work does not mean a retirement from meaningful contribution to the world. In fact, the people cited in the book, in some ways, contributed MORE to the world after their retirments. As a person approaching that age, I am glad to see retirement reframed as the start of an important second career.

Having retired this year, I was curious as to what I'd missed in my plans for this momentous life transition. So, I picked up "Life After Work" anticipating another book explaining to me how, at my age, I needed to "balance my portfolio" and cut back on the risk level of my investments. What a pleasant surprise. This book addresses the more difficult challenges of retirement: Who you are and how the person you are will be positively realized during this stage of life.

This book is a smooth read. The style is straight-forward and dynamic. It's like sitting down with a good friend and talking about personal decisions you have to make. The narrative style is easy to follow. There is a lot of theory in the discussion; however, it's presented in a muted fashion without the reader having to cope with the technical language of scholarly writings. Let me be clear, though; this book is based on sound scholarship both by the authors and the sources they incorporate into the analyses, conclusions, and suggestions offered throughout.

Most readers will know something about the six people profiled in Life After Work. If not, the profiles are so compact and engaging that readers will not be disadvantaged if these are new lives to examine. And, readers will be enriched by these life reviews done from a sensitive, loving perspective. It is clear that the authors truly like and respect the people they profile and from whom they extract significant lessons for all of us as we plan, experience, and reflect on our own retirements.

There are plenty of "buzz" words and phrases to take away from the reading. Primary examples are: Three R's of Responsibilities, Relationships, and Recreation; retirement takes many forms; life transition; guide to satisfactory retirement; and my favorite, the myth of found time. More importantly, the book has a real holistic feel to it, that is, there is an interaction that goes on throughout the book so at the end all the pieces of the puzzle fit together. And this puzzle, presented by this excellent book, is truly about the personal side of retirement.

I strongly recommend this lively and engrossing book for readers of any age. They certainly will come away with a different perspective on this wonderful event - retirement - which we all hope to experience.

I was reading Life After Work while in line at the airport, and the man behind me said, "Life After Work, I've got to read that!" He's right: This book is a must-read for anyone contemplating retirement. As the authors rightfully point out, much of what fills bookshelves and magazine articles about retirement addresses the financial aspects: how much money do you need to retire, how to save for retirement, etc. What's often missing from those reports is what Arthur Dauria and Walter vom Saal, the authors of Life After Work, call "the personal side of retirement." They write, "Financial security is not the only important issue in retirement. Beyond a certain level, more money does not lead to more happiness."

The rest of the book is devoted to that question: how to have a happy, fulfilling retirement. To answer that question, the authors take a unique and engaging approach. They profile six famous people, each of them with unique reasons for retiring and experience after retiring. It's a diverse group in terms of gender, race, and life experience: Sarah and Bessie Delany, African-Americans who grew up in the rural south and became bestselling authors after age 100; Lee Iacocca, the former CEO of Chrysler, multiple academy award-winning actress Katharine Hepburn; Jimmy Carter, the 39th President of the United States; and Arthur Ashe, tennis champion and civil rights advocate.

As a person who doesn't read People magazine or biographies, I was actually surprised and how successfully the authors drew me into the stories of these famous individuals. After giving the background of each person's life and describing the successes (or failures) of their retirements, the authors then draw conclusions about how we can better prepare for (and better enjoy) our own retirement.

The authors' suggestions and advice for successful retirement are drawn from the life stories they tell, and also are supported by research they describe. I was surprised to learn that only 1 in 20 older Americans is in a nursing home, and the book is filled with other similar tidbits that push one's thinking beyond what we hear about retirement or aging in the news. I loved their quote from the Sarah and Bessie Delany, "cut back on your possessions. The more you own the more time you waste taking care of things." I'm going to try to start doing that long before retirement. No matter who you are -- male or female, artist or business leader, rich or poor, you can find role models in this book.

The authors also devote a section to what they call the "three Rs of retirement" -- responsibilities, relationships, and recreation, which is a great added bonus at the end of the book. Overall, Life After Work is a unique and informative book: combining advice with biography. I highly recommend it!

I don't know much about Helen Nearing, having just begun to read books by and about her and Scott Nearing, her husband. Among a bunch of such books I checked out from library, this is a second title I picked up and read, following *Living the Good Life - How to Live Sanely and Simply in a Troubled World* (1970). Reading this title (Living the Good Life), it was really great to know that the Nearings were no simple folks when it comes to intellectual matters. So far from it. Both Helen and Scott Nearing were clear, elegant, and forceful, in their thinking and writing. To such an extent that you soon begin to trust them as your teachers.

And this book shows how--how Helen Nearing became what she was. The "Foreword," which was written when Helen was 91 and near her own death, is almost startling in its, yes, wisdom and profundity, which are clad in simple and clear words. In this regard, the opening words--"There is much speculation about life after death. What about life before death? To learn how to be old is one of life's last lessons. To learn how to die is the very last lesson of all"--sound almost like Rilke, one of the greatest poets of the 20th century, who could be unfathomably profound in clear, simple, everyday, words.

The quotes in the book can very well stand on their own as the "wise words" about aging and dying, words that are "too good to lose," as Helen put it. On the other hand, they show us the *reader* Helen Nearing was. You realize early on that many of these quotes do really come from her reading of the books tht contain them. Such realization can be quite refreshing, considering that very many people make quotes (good or bad) from, well, quotes, or book of quotes. The authors and their books that contributed to the making of this gem-like collection of wise words on aging and dying were ones that inspired Helen and led her to what she became.

*My favorite comes from Edith Wharton: "In spite of illness, in spite even of the archenemy, sorrow, one can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways."

Helen Nearing's galaxy of quotations from the likes of Ghandi, Freidan, Woolf, Einstein, Wharton, and Lao Tzu (and scintillating many more) on the subject of aging and dying is somewhat like meditating under a summer sky's meteor shower, each new light a brilliant, breath-catcher. With this collection, this "study for eternity" (Nearing quoting Emerson), Nearing restores elements of wonder and mystery to living and dying , rescuing them (and us!) from the pervasive and monotone hellfire school of western religious tradition. Among my many dozens of favorite Nearing choices is this from Hazlitt (Table Talk, 1821) : "To die is only to be as we were before we were born".

As the subtitle notes "An inspirational gathering of thoughts on living a good old age into death" this is a book of quotes from elder on subjects from Good Old Age to The Art of Dying and Death the Great Good. I find its value is simply in talking about death in a positive and not a dreaded manner. Quotes from all walks of life and belief systems.

I wrote a review for this book and submitted it on the 19th or so, and you have not posted it. Why is that?

Have you ever had a teacher who made a great contribution to your life? As you became older and wiser, did you realize more and more how much of a positive impact that person made to your life? If this is the case, this book is for you. For many of us, there is someone from our past that gave to us a "gift we know we never can repay". Did you, like most of us, take that person for granted at the time? What was that person really like in their life beyond being a teacher? In the book Living Every Minute, author Nancy Delano Moore gives a warm account of just such a person. You will, in all probability, find many parallels to that special someone from your own past who gave so much to you. For people who were fortunate enough to have such a person in their life during the developing years, this book is a must.

When a beloved family member has increasing dementia over a long period of time it is hard to understand what is happening emotionally as well as intellectually. To understand is a real blessing to loved ones. Nancy Delano Moore has shared in a compelling way in LIVING EVERY MINUTE her struggle to cope with her mother's lengthy decline. Having seen a great number of families in similar situations while working with Area Agencies on Aging for a period of twenty years, I am convinced that Nancy Moore's telling of her story will be a valuable gift for both older adults and for their families.

My mother recently passed away after being very ill for six years. Although I am the eldest of six, most of the responsibility fell to me. There were many dark days for me with various siblings as well as with my parents, but this book was a great help to clarify my mission, adjust my attitude, and continue what I knew I had to do. All matters emotional & practical are addressed with no sugar coating. I have ordered several copies to share with friends dealing with elderly parents.

Despite the misleading title of LOVING YOUR PARENTS WHEN THEY CAN NO LONGER LOVE YOU, this is an excellent treatise on caring for aging parents at any stage of their decline. Author Terry Hargrave (FINISHING WELL, FAMILIES AND FORGIVENESS) offers competent, concrete, and compassionate help for adult children specifically addressing the spiritual, emotional, physical, and mental ramifications of caregivers and their aging parents.

Hargrave acknowledges that caring for an aging parent can be a wearisome, seemingly thankless task. "When we give care to an older person, however, we sacrifice for one who grows weaker, interacts less, and eventually will die," writes Hargrave. "It is a service and sacrifice for which we see very little --- maybe even nothing. Caregiving for an older person is purely about servanthood." In providing care for the elderly, we care for our own souls, he believes.

For those whose parents are in the early stages of decline, Hargrave offers a simple chart, the "Instrumental Activities of Daily Living and Activities of Daily Living" that allows adult children to assess how much care the parent requires. Can he cook a meal safely? Is she capable of unassisted walking? Can he take his medications unassisted?

Once it's established that some sort of intervention is required, he explains the four ways an aging parent might respond. There is the "make lemonade" type who makes caregiving pleasant; the "pretend it's not happening" type who insists he doesn't need help; the "poor pitiful me" type who acts helpless to do anything on her own; and the "whatever" type who is passive and possibly depressed. Hargrave offers suggestions for responding to each type with compassion and firmness.

He points out three areas that must be addressed: Medications, incontinence, and driving, and ideas for sensitively assessing and confronting each issue with the parent. A whole chapter is devoted to housing: Where should the failing parent live? What modifications can be made in the home so the parent can stay independent as long as possible? What are the positives and negatives about hiring a caregiver? What options are available when full-time care becomes necessary?

Another chapter helps the adult child open up conversations about finances, and avoid disagreements and misuse of the family's money by ill-intentioned siblings. His illustrations are firmly grounded in reality --- not all families will agree on how a parent should be cared for, and not all stories end happily-ever-after. However, his practical advice will help a number of readers avoid many of the common conflicts in caregiving.

There's a specific chapter on the warning signs and the implications of caring for elderly parents who have dementia and Alzheimer's. "No one can quite describe the pain of having your parent, who has loved you with all of his or her heart, look at you and not have the slightest idea who you are," writes Hargrave, who is a caregiver for his mother-in-law, who has Alzheimer's. "It is a slow, excruciating grief, something like pulling off an enormous Band-Aid wrapped around your heart --- but you don't get it yanked off quickly with one sharp pain; rather, it gets pulled off slowly and painfully over many years."

A controversial, but necessary, chapter deals with the inevitable death of the parent. Hargrave discusses such difficult decisions as when to intervene, and when prolonging death becomes its own tragedy. He emphasizes the importance of a living will, and making sure adult children have access to it. He also believes in the importance of helping an elderly parent die well, and shows several scenarios that illustrate what this might look like (giving the parent permission to die, hospice, talking about death and what the parent would like to see happen at the funeral).

You'll want to keep the Kleenex handy as Hargrave shares his own experiences and stories of those families he has counseled when he worked in a personal care facility for the elderly. Each poignant story illustrates factual information, vividly showing what the response to a situation with an elderly parent might look like in "real life." Questions for discussion or personal reflection end each chapter.

This helpful book will smooth the way for adults to care for their aging parents with compassionate wisdom.

--- Reviewed by Cindy Crosby

Taking on a tough and timely issue for millions of Americans, Terry D. Hargrave's book is much more than the title would suggest. It is about more than dealing with aging parents with Alzheimers or another mental problems where they can no longer express affection for you the way they once did. It also examines the problems of how the need to care for aging parents may disrupt your life and plans. How do you deal with dependent parents? How do you deal with forgetfulness, not taking medicine, doing things they should no longer be doing, etc. The book and the advice it contains is both practical, such as finishing up family business, and enlightening.

The author deals with this problem in part by changing perspective and viewing the process of caring for aging parents as a spiritual journey that you undertake. He also looks from the perspective of the parent - trying to deal with declining health, a lack of independence, and other normal changes that come with age.

One particularly valuable aspect of the book is that it provides a clear vision of areas that need to be discussed and dealt with as parents age. These areas include legal and financial decisions, how much care is needed, when it needs to be done, by whom it should be done, various living options, depression, dementia, alzheimer's disease, dealing with a parent who has been unkind, and accepting and planning for death. Loving Your Parents When They Can No Longer Love You is highly recommended for anyone dealing with aging parents and the life changes that come about as a result.

Mackie Shilstone's book,Maximum Energy For Life, saved my life.I was given three years to live due to a potential for heart disease.I followed his guidelines in his book.In six weeks, all my abnormal lab tests,cholesterol,triglycerides,glucose,etc, normalized.I also regained my passion for life.This book will change your life for the positive.Maximum Energy For Life gave me back my life and completely showed me how to take back ownership of my health.I would recommend it as a life saver.No other program compares to it to date.Thank you Mackie Shilstone.You are the world's best performance enhancement expert.

In 21 days, this book can help you change your life. I had been feeling depressed by some recent weight gain and Mackie Shilstone's offered the best pick-me-up out there. Incorporating meal plans with exercise tips, this book put me back on the right track. Plus, the book does not stop attaining physical health. It also gives great advice on how to reach an emotionally healthy state. Definintely a great book!

This is a fantastic new fitness book -- it really shows you how to get fit and healthy now. The advice is sound and this book tells you everything you need to know about how to exercise properly to get great results, and the fitness information is combined with lots of healthy eating info and "life" info -- how to reduce stress and live a healthier, fuller life. I'm so happy to have found this book as the holidays and the new year approaches as I've been wanting to (finally) get fit for so long!

Professors Einstein and McDaniel, in their easy-to-read guide to "memory fitness," debunk the myth that growing old means that one's memory is certain to decline significantly.

The book guides readers through understandable explanations of how our memories work, and the changes to expect. Best, strategies are offered to improve our memories, with emphasis on mental activity as well as physical exercise.

Most practical and satisfying are the many graphic demonstrations throughout the chapters which allow the reader to understand how his or her own memory is working.

Older adults should own this book, even if nothing else is learned, just to review the "cues" which one can use to serve as reminders to remember something. Younger adults need this book to complete a comprehensive approach to general fitness.

Though I have owned a computer for 22 years, I thought, at 76, that my brain's "hard drive" was too full to tackle much more data. Einstein and McDaniel's book has convinced me that there is room for much, much more. So, this year I've learned 130 new square dance steps.

MEMORY FITNESS: A GUIDE FOR SUCCESSFUL AGING will help you too.

There have been several books published about memory and maintaining memory skills but this book is notable in its comprehensive look at the various facets of memory and how aging affects them. The book's first five chapters evaluate the current science of memory and explain how people use memory. Thereafter the book provides guidance on how one can work to improve memory in certain areas and develop strategies to cope with those natural impairments to memory that develop as a person ages. This book is very well written and notable for its optimistic outlook and lack of egotistical hype.

Dr. Einstein was my Memory and Cognition professor and when I found out that he wrote a book, I decided to buy the book for my own information and for my parents to see it, if they so desired. I found the book to be not only a wonderful overview and recap of things that we learned in class, but also a great asset for everyone as they gain wisdom and years. People give up hope and expect to have increasing memory problems with age, but they don't imagine what they could do to help themselves beyond the use of post-it notes. I highly recommend this book!

Quoting from the back cover:

""When I first wrote Senior Moments I had no idea of the impact that it would make upon the reader. It wasn't until I began to get phone calls and e-mails about the content that I became aware of what readers really thought. They asked for more senior moments topics. They wanted to know more about self-identity, exercise, family strife, accepting death, sex, and many other topics..."

"In More Senior Moments, the sequel to author David Wayne Silva's popular anthology Senior Moments, you'll find an all-new collection of stories and essays on growing older. Like the first book in the series, More Senior Moments was written to help seniors find the answers to common questions with simple stories told by their peers. The well-thought out and sympathetic advice encourages those entering their golden years to face both the joys and problems that come with aging.

"Silva writes: "Seniors, this is your book. It contains your stories and your ideas. It is about you. I just put it together. Most of the stories and information in this book come from your friends and neighbors, from my own experience, and from the medical profession that takes care of us. After years of working as a counselor, I find it easy to approach my senior friends and ask for their ideas on different subjects. They feel comfortable talking about their emotions and their physical problems even touchy subjects like dressing themselves and sexual matters. Many senior men and women have worked together with me on this book. It is good that we can band together and help each other have more enriching lives while we accept the challenges of aging.""

I reviewed David Silva's first book, Senior Moments, in February 2006 and was delighted with his writing at that time. As the quote from the back cover states, More Senior Moments is a continuation on the theme of senior topics and inspirational stories. This book is also contains thirty-three short chapters.

David Silva was a teacher, school administrator, and family/grief counselor prior to his retirement, and I'm certain these aspects of his life played an integral part in the creation of his well-written books. If you're a senior, young or old, you will find helpful information on many subjects, plus lots of inspiration to help keep us in a positive frame of mind. I'm a senior myself and appreciate the time and effort David has taken to create these inspirational books.

Kaye Trout
Reviewer

This was written by the author, David Wayne Silva. He wants everyone to know the good news about More Senior Moments. This book was a finalist in the National Best Books 2007 Award.

More Senior Moments by David Wayne Silva is an informative and enlightening read. This book encompasses medical, psychological and personal knowledge to explain many typical experiences associated with aging. The style of writing is easily maneuverable and flows quite well.

The information in this book would not only be helpful and effective for the aging, but also for those who have loved ones who are entering their twilight years. There is an easy balance of medical research and personal vignettes to facilitate comprehension.

"No More Horse Estrogen" is an invaluable health guide for women and everyone else who seeks to be in charge of their health. I came across the book when I was 47 and experiencing erratic menstrual cycles supposedly due to perimenopause. After following the lifestyle guidelines (nutrition, use of specified supplements, etc.)that Mason recommends in his book, my cycles stabilized and ultimately I completed menopause at age 48 with absolutely no symptoms whatsoever - no night sweats, no mood swings, "no nothin." After confirming I had completed menopause, my physician asked if I wanted to go on hormone replacement therapy. I adamantly refused stating that I was doing absolutely fine. (I'll be 50 next month.) It's very reassuring to be able to take charge of one's health and avoid what the media and conventional Western wisdom tells women that most of them will have to endure in middle age. The only catch, fellow woman, is that you have to accept responsibility for taking the initiative and having the discipline to make the necessary lifestyle changes. None are complicated, but they do require a commitment, follow through. It's up to you - choose natural health! Read and apply Mason's guidelines starting now! You'll be so glad you did!

Laura V. Rodriguez
Silver Spring, MD

After having read many other books on this subject by so-called experts, and STILL not feeling better, I decided to read this one. This no-nonsense book is easy to read and spells out the truth about hormones and hormone replacement as they relate to women. Additionally, Mr. Mason lays out a healthy plan that any woman can follow. I spent 5 years feeling bad, and after following this author's plan for a few months, I lost weight, gained energy and felt like ME again. Thank you, Roger.

THis is worth reviewing as you enter menopause. I firmly believe you should have as much information available as posible so you can make the correct choices. This was an excellent and informatinve aide to me.

The Nursing Home Handbook is thorough and well written. It answered nearly all my questions and many I never thought of. My remaining questions are: Which are the best places? Are they easily accessible? How much do they cost? I still have to do research, but this book provides criteria by which to judge.

I recommend this book for anyone who needs help choosing a nursing home or dealing with one already chosen. It may also help you decide, as I did, that a nursing home is not the right choice at this time.

This book is a quick read, but is stuffed full of good information and practical tidbits. I read it in just a few hours and learned a tremendous lot. I especially liked the boxed text in the margins with interesting little factoids and suggestions.

For instance, when I asked to read my loved one's medical chart I was told, "okay, but hurry. I don't want anyone to see that I'm letting you do this." In Davis' book, she states that we have a legal right to read our own medical charts. Her book is full of this type of "been there, done that" advice.

The next to last chapter, which gives some information on hospice and practical advice on how to sit by the bedside when it's time for your loved one to leave this world, was very well written and is alone worth the price of this book.

I've read many of these books and this is one of the few that I'd highly recommend.

Ruth Davis writes with humor and great practicality on a topic that I find uncomfortable and somewhat overwhelming. She provides information on all aspects of nursing home care --from finding the right setting, to coping with details of day to day life in a home, to the last moments. I love her use of sidebars, little snippits of advice, often filled with humor and always packed with common sense. I would recommend this book to anyone facing the problem of long term care for self or loved one.

This little book is like a fast elevator that breezlily shuttles you to all the floors in a high rise department store. But then, I suppose you have to be a woman of a certain age to remember high rise department stores. You can't help but smile as you see some of the names on the floors. Pumps or Stilleto's? Exercise..hmmm...and to think they used to say 'pushing Forty was enough exercise! Once you've reached the top of the store you can see the vista of a life well lived and well devoted to chocolate. But there is something else, chocolate not withstanding, and that is the comfort food that is girl talk.

After thoroughly enjoying her first book, Champagne in a Plastic Glass, I just started Ms. LeGree's new one, Old Girl Talk, and it has already made me laugh aloud in several places. Wonderful work. Vivian Gumpf

If you're looking for a book that will make you laugh from beginning to end, pick up "Old Girl Talk." Ms. Legree's sense of humor pervades throughout the pages of this small, but powerful book. "Old Girl Talk" not only brought a smile to my face, but outright laughter. From the very first pages, Legree takes the reader into her "girl talk" conversations as if she is sitting next to the reader having a cup of coffee.

One of the outstanding characteristics of this book is that the author's humor exudes so effortlessly throughout. The book covers womens' issues such as exercising, health, shopping, menopause, hairdos, aging, wrinkles, and many more concerns that women fret over. I especially love her observation of suddenly finding herself "frumpy" (her own description) and not a young woman anymore. I admire her sheer honesty in sharing her innermost thoughts, emotions, and anecdotes.

She states that "OLD" isn't a four letter word and reminds women that in many cultures throughout the world older women are revered and admired. So why should we women feel so uneasy with the aging process? She conveys to the reader the fact that we don't have to feel afraid about aging gracefully. Instead, she suggests finding something that brings us passion...something we find important to accomplish and enjoy doing. She found writing to be that passion. AND she certainly entertains her readers.

As I read the book, I found myself laughing and thinking, "Wow, I can relate to that!" I think most women can find themselves in the pages of "Old Girl Talk" and take comfort in knowing that we are not alone in our cares, joys, worries,insecurities, and fears. They are universal. Instead of complaining about the aging process, she encourages women to accept themselves just as they are. We all have talents and abilities within us...we just have to bring them to the surface and enjoy life to the fullest. I highly recommend this gem of a book.

Nancy A. Draper (Author) A Burden of Silence: My Mother's Battle with AIDS