Don Books

This is a book everyone should read. The author gives a candid look into a heart-wrenching world of child abuse. Then, through her adult life experience and soul-searching, describes the very difficult process of struggling with forgiveness as most people have learned it should be. Should be is the qualifying term. The author's journey to the discovery of insight in healing first and what forgiveness can be, should be read by all...those effected by abuse, those who know of someone effected by abuse, and those struggling to forgive at all.

Heal & Forgive -- I devoured this book in one evening. And I commented on it in a family rift blog site on the web. I didn't have the same abuse as the author did, but most of my abuse came from my own older sister over many years - emotional (putting me down at every turn) and physical (as in hitting - using hangers, elastic belts, etc.). I don't believe my Mom was witness to any of the physical abuse but I do know that she heard much of what sister would say to me -- and did nothing. My dad worked shift work so he was not around and Mom didn't believe anything I would tell her about sister saying / doing to me.... I learned to never saying anything - became moody about the situation and was accused of having a "chip on my shoulder" - all through my childhood. No one wanted to see my older sister in any sort of a bad light (she was favored by my Dad's Mother & Sister - I was not) - so I needed to be quiet about it and I was. Growing up in a dysfunctional family is not something you recognize until you are older and gain insight. I didn't find out how dysfunctional my family was until I went through counseling myself at 48 yrs. old.

After being on the blog site and reading this book - the big *aha* moment for me (and for the author as related in the book) was when she told her therapist that she just wanted to have *her story heard* - that was the biggest thing she needed in her life.... her two brothers didn't want to hear about it and neither did her 1/2 brother (even though they too had experienced abuse also) and eventually to keep their world quiet about it they shut her out of their lives. She also realized that she, being a female, was not in favor from the get go with her own Mother. Her Mother favored her sons over her only daughter. She was blamed constantly for the abuse because she stood up to the abuser.....

Her story resonated with me.

After much research and reading - she discovered that forgiving first does not help you heal as many therapist believed years ago, but that a person needs to heal (be heard, have therapy, mature, read everything on the subject -- and I recommend Louise L. Hay's books to help you with that healing too) from the past somewhat before they can move on to the forgiveness part.

Her book was wonderful find for me and highly recommended via the people who participate in the blog I am a member of -- and the author is a member of the blog also.

For anyone who has childhood anger, emotional issues, abuse from childhood (whatever the form), problems that are connected in some way via their childhood, this book is a must to read. We all need to heal, we all want to be happy, we all need to be loved. This book can be a step in the right direction to help you on the road to healing too. Get the book and get on the road to healing.

Nancy Richards offers a fresh face to the concept of forgiveness in her book Heal and Forgive: Forgiveness in the Face of Abuse. It deserves a closer look from anyone struggling with recovery from childhood abuse.

A woman who runs a ministry for adult daughters of controlling and abusive families recommended I take a look at Richards' work when I shared with her my own journey. I ordered it last week and found it so absorbing I finished it in just over two hours.

Ms. Richards walks us through her own brutal childhood, one that we discover began at birth, and became exacerbated after her father died and her mother remarried to a man who was extremely cruel and sadistic. We learn about the literal joy he took out of beating Nancy and her brothers, how he ripped everyone apart with his words and would look for anything he could find to perpetrate the terror he inflicted. Worse yet is the ways we learn this man is able to influence Nancy and her siblings to turn on each other, and how she becomes the household scapegoat.

Eventually Nancy leaves home to marry and start a family of her own. We learn her family of origin does not improve, take responsibility or offer amends for their past behavior. Instead, her mother proceeds to divorce and remarry several abusive men in succession, and continues to promote blaming Nancy for all the "family's" problems, to the extent that she convinces everyone Nancy is crazy and to side against her.

Ms. Richards attempts this whole time to forgive her abusers. After all, aren't we all taught to leave the past behind, forgive other's wrongs, and be family no matter what? Don't they tell us that unless we do these things, we won't heal?

But in the course of her efforts she finds the opposite - she is unable to heal. To the contrary, the harder she tries, the more pain she feels, the greater her resentments, and the more abuse her family of origin is able to heap on her.

In Nancy's quest to figure out why this isn't working, she comes across an understanding therapist and several books from psychological and spiritual perspectives that turn our culture's traditional concept of forgiveness upside down. She learns that perhaps the solution for her is to NOT forgive in the way she has been led to believe, that the whole idea of making peace while overlooking the evil of abusive behaviors is in fact self-defeating and self-destructive. Nancy realized that she must think first of her own needs, to protect herself and her own family.

The end result is that Ms. Richards ends up "divorcing" her mother, which also causes an unfortunate loss of relationships with other family members, including her brothers. As of the publication she had not spoken to any of them in twelve years.

She also decides to stop working on forgiving them, and start focusing on her recovery and her daughters. It is these actions in themselves that allow healing to flow into her life, and eventually, she is able to find TRUE forgiveness.

I found this book to be very powerful in both the story it had to tell, and in the message it had to give. I have followed a very close path in my own life; the parallels between her family's behavior and mine were eerie. I too have had to "divorce" my family of origin and in the process lost relationships with other relatives, and even some family friends. So to read such a similar story as mine was incredibly validating.

On a spiritual level I also found Nancy's story and her sharing of some resources regarding forgiveness to be a relief. Like myself, Ms. Richards is a Christian, and she includes pieces of wisdom from others within that vein who support a different concept of forgiveness and do so from a Christian perspective. As someone who felt torn over whether my choices broke the commandment to honor my mother and father, this book served as a valuable resource to help me reconcile this area of my life.

I cannot recommend this book enough for anyone who is struggling with a family of origin that is broken due to unamended abuse. I also believe anyone who is a friend or loved one of someone recovering from childhood abuse will find this book beneficial for understanding the survivor's struggle to find healing and, yes, forgiveness.

Ms. Richards describes how physical and emotional child abuse can turn the non-abusing against the child and the children against one another. One of the ways that abusers maintain control is to divide and conquer the rest of the family. Everyone is afraid to become the abuser's next target. A scapegoat is picked and everyone uses the scapegoat to escape personal pain. Ms. Richards was that scapegoat in her family.

The abuse was particularly hard to bear because Ms. Richards biological father was a kind man who headed a loving family. After her father's untimely death, Ms. Richards found herself at the receiving end of abuse from a string of step fathers.

Even after she was grown and had escaped the den of horrors, Ms. Richards found it hard to escape the consequences of the abuse as she attempted to help her siblings.

During her recover, Ms. Richards found that much of the advice about forgiving abusers just didn't work for her. There was no relief and no reconciliation. Eventually, she "divorced" her family and put her energies into being a good Mom to her own children. When she had gained enough healing from this separation and building a healthy family life, Ms. Richards was finally able to forgive her abusers . . . and to gain relief from that forgiveness.

The lesson of this story is that those who are recovering from such horrible treatment need to listen to their hearts as they seek a happy, balanced life. Advice from others will only lead you so far on the path to recovery. Check that advice for whether it seems right before you try it. Also, don't expect that any abusing leopards are going to change their spots.

If you weren't abused, why should you read this book? I see several reasons. First is to witness and honor Ms. Richards' experiences. That's part of helping her become healthier. Second, this will help you be more vigilant in watching out for abuse among children you come into contact with. Children need caring adults to intervene on their behalf. Third, this book will help you be grateful for your blessings. You may think you've had a hard life, but maybe it wasn't so hard after all.

Heal and Forgive is the best book I've read in a very long time. As the director of Luke 17:3 Ministries for adult children of abusive, controlling or abandoning birth-families, I would be hard-pressed to come up with a more helpful book to recommend. It is unique in its perspective in that it teaches the reader that sometimes it is okay, and even necessary, NOT to forgive. It is a page turner right from the beginning, gripping you with Nancy Richards' riveting and disturbing story of her sadistic stepfather's violence and relentless abuse of herself and her brothers, and her mother's complicity in the abuse and complete refusal to protect her children in the slightest way.

Even more distressing is the author's account of her attempts to protect herself and her brothers, and to stand up and speak the truth about the abuse, which resulted in her treacherous mother convincing anyone who would listen that she was a liar and troublemaker with mental problems. There is a twisted episode in which her stepfather was finally going to move out, but her mother told the then 12-year old author to ask him to stay. He did stay, and years later the mother blamed her daughter for controlling her marriage (at age 12!) and making her husband stay when she could have been rid of him sooner.

Long after the evil stepfather was gone and the author was grown, her mother continued to expose the author's younger brothers to repeated abuse from a string of other losers she became involved with. Nancy Richards tells, in heart-wrenching detail, of her attempts to protect her younger siblings, to get anyone to listen to her or believe her, and to somehow maintain a relationship with the mother she still loved and the rest of her family.

But, in a scenario disturbingly familiar to many abuse survivors, her mother managed to convince most of the family that Richards was the problem, and to turn almost her entire family against her, including the brothers she had tried so hard and sacrificed so much to protect. The denial, betrayals, and blatant lies as the family protected the abusers and scape-goated the author will ring true with so many of us.

And then the author was left to embark on the path to forgiveness, with absolutely no remorse or repentance from those she was pressured to forgive, and not even any validation of her traumatic experiences. At each stage of the process, she faced renewed pain with every new revelation, such as the realizations that her mother was the one who betrayed her the most, and that her mother really never loved her.

Throughout her long and difficult journey to forgiveness and recovery, the author has many valuable insights which she lovingly shares with us. The most important insight, which is the main premise of the book, is that healing needs to come FIRST, BEFORE forgiveness. We usually feel pressured to forgive prematurely, by family and friends, therapists, and society in general. But forced forgiveness is not always possible, and is certainly not healthy.

The author teaches us that forgiveness is a process that begins with healing, and needs to include other elements as well, such as validation, anger, grief, and protection. In the process of her recovery, Nancy Richards read other author's works, which helped her to understand these truths about forgiveness, and she quotes from them in her book. When reading Heal & Forgive, one gets the sense that the author is not just writing about her own experiences, but is doing all she can to present a well-rounded and informed picture that will help other abuse victims as much as possible. She opens her heart to us, and shares her innermost thoughts and every feeling she has that might validate our own feelings and help us on our road to recovery.

The book is an easy read, and I was able to finish it in a few sittings. It was a hard book to put down, and I hated to walk away from it in the middle of the story without finding out what was going to happen next. It was a lot of food for thought. Nancy Richards does all abuse victims a favor when she teaches us that sometimes no matter what we are willing to do and how hard we are willing to try, it is just not possible to have a relationship with some people. We understand how important it is to stand up and tell the truth- to others and to ourselves.

When we realize that someone we love doesn't love us, the truth can be so hard to bear, but it is still the truth, and denying it doesn't change anything. We learn that sometimes we need to make the choice to walk away from a toxic relationship. We feel validated in learning that it is alright NOT TO FORGIVE evil people, and that releasing ourselves from the pressure to forgive gives us the freedom to heal. Only after we have healed will we be able to come to a place of genuine forgiveness.

After reading Heal & Forgive, I admire Nancy Richards for her courage and determination to heal and lead a life of peace and happiness despite her birth-family's rejection, and I am appreciative of her sincere efforts to encourage the rest of us and validate our experiences by sharing her story. Her triumph over the devastation and heartache inflicted by those she loved is an inspiration to anyone who thinks they can never get over the pain and be happy again. I urge all those who have felt the knife of a loved one's betrayal in their back, or who feel pressured to forgive before they are ready, to read this book. It is a must-read for any survivor of birth-family abuse.

If you've been fortunate enough to experience a workplace that crackles with creative energy and productivity, you know all about "Hot Spots." College professor Lynda Gratton has spent more than 10 years studying the internal corporate junctures where innovation, excitement and collaboration meet. She found that organizations that create the fertile conditions in which Hot Spots emerge and flourish are rewarded with exceptional value and growth. In fact, she demonstrates that leading companies, such as BP and Nokia, cultivate Hot Spots as an integral part of their corporate cultures. If your company is stuck in the "Big Freeze" - the opposite of Hot Spots - you won't be able to turn things around overnight. But don't give Gratton's slightly overwritten yet intriguing book the cold shoulder. getAbstract thinks it might light a fire at many companies.

Creativiteit, inspiratie, leiderschap en innovatie zijn woorden die iets hebben met het overspringen van vonken, vlammend vuur, enthousiasme en flow. Je zou dergelijke fenomenen zo graag tastbaar, meetbaar, stuurbaar willen maken. Slecht nieuws: dergelijke hot spots zijn niet te plannen of op te leggen; de maakbaarheid valt tegen. Goed nieuws volgens Lynda Gratton : ze kunnen wel gefaciliteerd, gekoesterd en ontwikkeld worden. Slecht nieuws: ondanks de in het boek beschreven succesverhalen van Linux, BP, Nokia, Toyota, en dergelijke, is de auteur wel zo nuchter om aan te geven, dat allerhande oorzaken voor het afkoelen, uitdoven of afsterven van hot spots kunnen leiden. Handle with care, dus.

Hoewel een literatuuropgave ontbreekt, Lynda Gratton wel de interdisciplinaire aanpak voor haar onderzoek en achterin in een appendix de gehanteerde inzichten uit de psychologie, economie, etc. aangeeft, kun je Hot Spots goed plaatsen in het verlengde van Peter Senge's Fifth Discipline (met name het systeemdenken is ook in Hot Spots uitgewerkt in diagrammen en toelichting), Meerwaarde-innovatie en de ideeën van Robert E. Quinn over de productieve gemeenschap. Kapstok om hot spots te kunnen laten ontstaan zijn - niet verrassend - aanstekelijke visie, doel en vragen. De conversatie aangaan (Peter Senge zou dialoog gebruiken).

Het ontstaan en voortbestaan van een hot spot is afhankelijk van de combinatie van vier factoren:
1. een `coöperatieve mindset': een geheel van overtuigingen en daarbij passende denkwijzen en houdingen dat de wil en het belang van hechte samenwerking tot uitdrukking brengt. Het eigenbelang of najagen van eigen succes, de basis van veel (andere) business en management modellen, is dodelijk voor een hot spot. Al te sterke individuele beloningstructuren ook. Terug naar de samenwerking.
2. Grenzen overschrijden: hoewel grensoverschrijdende samenwerking in de praktijk uiterst moeilijk valt te realiseren (tijd, competenties, andere werkzaamheden, work/life balance), geven succesvolle praktijkvoorbeelden (BP en Nokia) aan hoe belangrijk een dergelijke samenwerking is voor het ontstaan van innovatieve projectgroepen en Communities of Practice.
3. Aanstekelijk doel waar de participanten zich in herkennen en voor willen gaan, in woord en daad.
4. Productief vermogen: er moet wel wat uitkomen, en dus zijn afspraken over tijd, opleveringen en resultaten noodzakelijk. Conflicthantering is daarbij een noodzakelijke competentie.

Waar andere modellen de adoptie van best practices benadrukken, gaat Gratton een stap verder, namelijk erop wijzen, dat de 'signature processen' nog belangrijker zijn: de binnenwereld naar buiten brengen. Andere auteurs zouden het in dit kader hebben over organisatie DNA, het wezen van de organisatie, de missie, organizational story telling. Hierbij past leiderschap die inspireren, faciliteren, coachen en bruggen bouwen. De auteur biedt een aantal vragenlijsten aan om de as-is situatie rondom hot spots en de bijbehorende cultuur in de eigen organisatie inzichtelijk te maken. Natuurlijk worden zowel de lezer als auteur enthousiast bij het (h)erkennen van hot spots in 'echte' organisaties, al blijft het 'hoe dan' in de praktijkverhalen naar mijn smaak nog onderbelicht.

Zonder het boek of Lynda Gratton als zodanig op een voetstuk te willen plaatsen, bevestigen de onderzoeksresultaten het uitgeput zijn van modellen die alleen voor management van middelen, efficiency maatregelen, de harde kant van de business gaan en onderkent ze de noodzaak mogelijkheden voor innovatie en productiviteitsverbetering te zoeken bij de mensen en de eigen organisatie. Het sociaal en relationeel kapitaal is zeker bij de grote, internationaal opererende, uit diverse fusies en overnames samengestelde ondernemingen, of uitgebreider in het ecosysteem (allianties, partners, etc.) veel groter dan tot nu toe benut.

If you are contemplating to make your unit, your organisation and your environment more innovative, exciting and stimulating then "Hot Spots" is a must read.

The author, Lynda Gratton, a professor at the London Business School and a renowned authority on HR Strategy presents a concise yet compelling framework for promoting greater levels of cooperation towards the creation of positive energy, more productivity and innovation in the workplace.

The core of the book is most effectively presented in chapters 3 to 6 which dwell upon the four elements, the essentials to create a "Hot Spot" as under:

The first element towards the creation of a "Hot Spot" is towards "developing a cooperative mindset (where trust and a helpful attitude are a must).

The second element relates to the concept of "boundary spanning" (people working in and across groups, functions and business units for the sharing of knowledge through close/familiar colleagues/friends as well as acquaintances/associates.

The third element relates to an "igniting purpose" (working for an ambitious and overreaching goal/task - here the role of the leader, be it the CEO, the unit head and the team leader to inspire and motivate through asking difficult and purposeful questions is a crucial element and is further explored in Chapter 7).

Productive Capacity i.e. the fourth and final element is really about managing these groups and teams in terms of appreciating talents, about making and keeping commitments and in managing conflict and time.

The book also contains an excellently worded appendix that acts as a resource guide complete with diagnostic surveys for the creation of "Hot Spots." This section is in essence a mini workshop on "Hot Spots" and is a must read to be used by teams and colleagues alike.

The book's underlying message is crisp and most relevant yet seemingly difficulty to apply in the real world of organisational life i.e. for organisations to flourish and create value, processes need to be created and fostered towards the building of partnerships and alliances; an essential prerequisite being an collaborative mindset existing amongst it's people.

Professor Gratton's treatise on "Hot Spots" makes for a very interesting read and is quite inspirational backed by a decade of research on some of the top-performing organisations the world over (BP, Goldman Sachs, Nokia, Ogilvy One to name a few).

Readers are also urged to read two of her earlier excellent and inspirational works - Living Strategy (2001) and The Democratic Enterprise (2004) which complete this trilogy (wherein Hot Spots is the third).

A highly recommended read for all in the corporate fraternity.



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The fundamental equation "Hot Spots = (Cooperative Mindset x Boundary Spanning x Igniting Purpose) x Productive Capacity" is the organising principle of this book. All material is very well organised to illustrate and support this insight. The style is conversational and authoritative. There is a lack of pretension that is refreshing in business literature. The material is supported throughout by real life examples. My favourite is the `Truffles' initiative at OgilvyOne. There are many other examples across many industries.

Professor Gratton uses language in a way that reinforces the main messages and makes concepts memorable: `Signature Processes' describe activities that powerfully convey a company's character and passion; `Boundary Spanners' move in many worlds, share information and connect people. `Big Freeze' and `Country Club' describe sub-cultures unlikely to produce hotspots!

Appendix A contains some fabulous material to help readers interested in creating their own `hot spots' - including many diagnostic questions and ways to map your system. Go on......treat yourself....... you deserve it!

In this volume, Lynda Gratton explains how and why "boundaryless cooperation fuels innovation...why some teams, workplaces, and organizations buzz with energy - and others don't." The business model she recommends is an "open" one. In fact, it is precisely what Henry Chesbrough brilliantly explains in Open Innovation and in his more recent book, Open Business Models. What is a "boundaryless" organization? GE is probably the most prominent example. (Curiously, there are no references in Hot Spots to Chesbrough, GE or its former CEO, Jack Welch.) According to Gratton, a "boundaryless organization" is one within which people are engaged in "purposeful conversation"; there are no barriers to communication, cooperation, and collaboration; and the organization has an ever-widening "net of involvement."

Those whom Gratton calls "boundary spanners" are very important because they break down the "walls" between in-groups and out-groups. They have a network of relationships that form a natural bridge between the two groups. (Chesbrough calls them "innovation intermediaries.") In a boundaryless organization, people feel energized and vibrantly alive. Their brains buzz with ideas as they share with others the joy and excitement of "exploiting and applying knowledge that is already known and genuinely exploring what was previously unknown." Relationships between and among those involved create a Hot Spot.

"One of the most profound insights about Hot Spots is that their innovative capacity arises from the intelligence, insights, and wisdom of people working together. The energy contained in a Hot Spot is essentially a combination of their individual energy with the addition of the relational energy generated between them." Hence the importance of (a) having a "cooperative mindset," (b) "boundary spanners," (c) "igniting purpose," and (d) sustaining sufficient "productive capacity." Gratton acknowledges that there is much of substantial value to be learned by examining best practices in exemplary companies (e.g. BP, PgilvyOne, Nokia, and Linux)but also other types of practices, notably what she characterizes as "signature processes" which embody a given organization's character. They arise from passions and interests within the organization. Whereas best practices "bring the outside in," signature processes "bring the inside out."

To Gratton's great credit, after identifying the "what" in the Introduction and Chapters 1 and 2, she focuses most of her attention on "how" and "why" in the remaining six chapters. I also appreciate the provision of information in three appendices, especially in the first ("Resources for Creating Hot Spots"). And I especially appreciate Gratton's decision to want until the final chapter before explaining how to design (or re-design) an organization in which Hot Spots "emerge." The process consists of five phases best revealed within Gratton's narrative (i.e. in context) but I do presume to suggest that Hot Spots are inevitable and can exist anywhere, both physically and electronically. The challenge is to encourage and support them without institutionalizing ("housebreaking") them. That is a very real danger, one which Bob Taylor obviously recognized when he insisted that the Xerox Corporation allow him to establish - with unlimited funding -- the Palo Alto Research Center (PARC) which those at Xerox's corporate headquarters (in Connecticut) viewed as a "renegade" think tank. In fact, Taylor and his associates conceptualized the very notion of the desktop computer, long before IBM launched its PC, and it laid the foundation for Microsoft Windows with a prototype graphical user interface of icons and layered screens. Even the technology that makes it possible for these words to appear on the screen can trace its roots to Xerox's eccentric band of innovators. It is possible but highly unlikely that any of this could have been achieved, had the research center been absorbed within the Xerox corporate culture in the 1970s.

Guided and informed by Gratton's observations and recommendations, senior-level executives will be well-prepared to provide the leadership needed to avoid or overcome barriers to innovation within their organizations by nurturing a cooperative mindset, encouraging and supporting those who are "boundary spanners," igniting purpose at all levels and in all areas throughout the given enterprise, and - as a result -- sustain sufficient "productive capacity."

Those who share my high regard for this book are urged to check out two of Gratton's earlier works, Living Strategy: Putting People at the Heart of Corporate Purpose and The Democratic Enterprise: Liberating Your Business with Freedom, Flexibility, and Commitment. Also When Sparks Fly: Harnessing the Power of Group Creativity by Dorothy Leonard-Barton and Walter C. Swap, Organizing Genius: The Secrets of Creative Collaboration by Warren G. Bennis and Patricia Ward Biederman, and Juice: The Creative Fuel That Drives World-Class Inventors by Evan I. Schwartz.

I absolutely love this story. It was perfect for my son who at the time was a challenge at bedtime. I stillsometimes read this to him (now 5) but almost nightly to my daughter who is now 3.
The story is captivating enough to keep the little ones interestwith just the right number of words per page so that you are turning pages frequently. It is also educational in that kids learn number ordinance, and different animals. This book is a great find. It is a book you will definately read for years to come, my copy is already five years old !

This is a great bedtime book! I read it often to the kids, ages 3-10, at the daycare where I work when we are putting them to bed at night. In fact I've read it so often that I have it nearly memorized. The repeatizeness is comforting and the story is somthing they can identify with! I whole heartedly recommend it!

I have two young sons who are 3 & 4 years old. Everynight before bedtime, they get to pick out six books for us to read before they get tucked in, and everynight, this book is one they want to hear!

We've gotten into the habit of me pointing at them when it's time and they get to say, "I don't want to go to bed!"

Wonderful book! I highly recommend it to all children! Not only is it a great message, but it allows the youngsters to become involved in the story.

I don't want to go to bed is a great example of a perfect children's story. It has all the elements that are required for a children's story. These are, funny characters, good illistrations, the ability to relate to kids, and teaches them a lesson. It also has some much needed humor. It has all the elements and it isnt long and drug out and boring like many other children's storys. In conclusion, it is a great book and I would recomend it to any kids.

This book was a easy reading and totally enjoyable. All young readers having a bad time going to bed should read this book. This book is also really great for babysitters to read to thier children, whom they put kids to bed and which this is a really great bed time story book. I personally like this book because of it's beautiful pictures and kids get a kick out of this book.

My children really liked this book - it is sweet. I would recommend it if your child is having a little school anxiety.

It's about time that a book such as this one hit the shelves!! I work in the public school system and see 'separation anxiety' on a daily basis. Not only do children identify with the main character (what a cutie-pie!), the helpful tips in the book provide parents with the support they need to 'let go'and. I've noticed that many of the foster children in our program enjoy reading this book. All of the adults at my school have purchased copies of this book for their children, as well as, for their families. I can't wait to read more books by this author!!!!!

I have four children. My youngest started kindergarten this year and was extremely nervous about it. He's very clingy and very used to just being with me. Although he had attended pre-school, the idea of going on a bus to a "big school" frightened him. I heard about this book from a friend of mine and read it to my son a few days before he started school. He really enjoyed it and asked if he could bring it into school with him!The teacher read it to the class and raved about it too. This is definitely a beautiful and bright way of easing a young child's anxiety (and mom's anxiety!) about going off to school.

My daughter started to have issues with separation anxiety when she began first grade. After starting the new year, she started refusing to go to school and would cry for hours. It broke my heart to see her this way, and after speaking to her teacher and vice principal, we agreed that it would take some time and that we would all have to work together. I saw this book online and decided to give it a try. First of all, it is geared towards children. The pictures, as well as the story, helped my daughter relate to the main character. We even tried some of the things that the character did to help her feel secure in school. My daughter would bring a picture of us to school, or bring a small teddy bear to look at when she started to feel sad. We also cut a piece of one of my shirts and she would use it to not only dry her tears, but to carry in her pocket. In addition to the book, my daughter did see a child psychologist twice. Although it was a long and tough struggle, I am happy to say that it is now 4 months later and she is doing very well and has adjusted to first grade. What a relief! I recommend this book for those of you who find yourself in the situation that I was in. It is a great supplement to have while working towards helping your child gain that inner strength and courage. I advise you to use as many resources as you can.

I have a 3 year-old daughter who had a hard time adjusting to leaving me and going to pre-school. I have read "The Kissing Hand", a sweet book, but this one is much more specific to the feelings that children can have when they don't want to leave their Moms. My daughter loved the Honey Bee character. The book helps children to help themselves and it tells you exactly how to do it. The illustrations are adorable, too!

Inspecting the Aging Sailboat (The International Marine Sailboat Library)
This is an outstanding reference for initial inspection of an older sailboat. It allows you to determine whether it is worth it to spend the money on a marine survey. Once we actually buy a boat, it will also be a good reference for keeping up with maintenance so as to repair small issues before they become expensive problems.

This allowed me to do my own cursory review to determine if a boat warranted further consideration. Getting an inspection is costly. This books allows you to rule some boats out on your own.

Don Casey writes in a very understandable style and the text is full of helpful illustrations. This book gives you a lot of ideas of what to look for when you're first starting to shop. A survey is expensive, and if you can identify a lemon before you get to that point, you'll save yourself 10 times the cost of this book in time, heartache and money. And if you're not getting a survey, it may save you even more.

I'm in the market for an older sailboat. I'm not interested in spending the kind of money that many spend on their sailboats. This necessitates buying an older boat. This book is full of just the kinds of information that someone needs to make that purchase without regretting it. It covers everything you need to understand before making the purchase of an aging sailboat. I'm looking forward to using the information herein very soon. It is full of diagrams and illustrations that really provide an insight into what the book is saying.

I highly recommend this book to anyone in the market for a used fiberglass sailboat.

A great little, well illustrated book that will aid any prospective buyer of an old or even new yacht. If you're thinking about buying a yacht it can be too easy to fall in love and see straight through some rather serious faults. This book will guide you through all the obvious and not so obvious signs of use and abuse, poor workmanship and design, giving you an informed opinion as to whether or not to call a proffesional serveyor or forget it and keep saving for a new boat - I think I'll keep saving. Maybe they should retitle it 'Inspecting the hole in the sea you throw money into' - Jokes aside, highly recommended.

Since this is written much as a diary of a young WW2 fighter pilot there are some sections that, like life, are a little tedious. That fact aside I found Mr. Lopez's work an interesting and inciteful view of the famous Flying Tiger unit after it was absorbed into the Army Air Force after the US officially entered the war. I highly recommend the book to anyone interested in the China theater of the war and how it was used to get the Japanese to attack us and get us involved in WW2. The vivid air combat descriptions are great insights into what pilots of that era were up against as opposed to the "video game-like" air battles of today.

Haven't read a pilot's memoirs for quite a while, although doing much more of it now. Into the Teeth of the Tiger was the first of a long line of new purchases that I need to read and it was well worth the purchase. Mr Lopez, while an excellent flier and leader, is also a wonderful writer. He writes with modesty and is not afraid to describe his errors in addition to his successes. The action sequences are superb and the humour used by the pilots and crews to lighten things up a bit is guaranteed to generate a smile and even a chuckle. Of course, this is war and the deaths of friends and the treatment of the civilian population was no doubt shattering for all involved. I get the impression that this book has become somewhat of a classic and justly so. It is a well-written account of a less publicised theatre of the war by a (then) very young pilot. What these guys did at 20-25 really puts things into perspective. A bloody good read!

I've read a lot of World War II flying book and this is the best! Mr. Lopez writes well and tells the unvarnished truth of what it was like to fly a P-40 against an agile and determined foe.

Don Lopez was a 23-year-old fighter pilot in the 14th Air Force Flying Tigers, flying a war-weary P-40 against the Japanese army air force in such close combat that he once took a wing off a Nakajima Ki-43 Hayabusa ("Oscar"). Good pilots are easy to find, and so are good writers, but Don is that exceptional individual: a pilot who can write well and to the heart. This book is a keeper.

This is an engrossing story of a young fighter pilot's experiences flying P-40s and P-51s in mid to late World War Two with the 75th Fighter Squadron in China. Donald Lopez writes excellent flying sequences and conveys the essence of the people he flew and fought with. A good read if you have any interest in military history or aviation.

This sensitive, whimsical tale of coping with ones uniqueness is one of my favorite stories for my kindergarten students. The language is rich and descriptive. The illustrations are vivid and immaginative. My students laugh at the funny parts and they understand the heart of the story-regardless of ones differences, be they bespectacled or of uncommon name, each person is valuable just by being him or herself. "Way to go!" Ms. Day and Mr. Morris! Michael Stanley, Kindergarten Teacher, City Heights, San Diego

we love this book !!! My daughter has had it a few years and we recently went through her books she found it and still loves it.She now wears glasses.WE LOVE LUNA !!!! :)

Even as adults we have things that we wish we could change, or swear our lives would be better without. This book is a cute reminder that our strengths are what we should focus on, and the things we wish we could change aren't all that bad afterall. Great little book.

Luna is a great character, easy to identify with her ups and downs when one discovers the need for glasses in their life. Great addition to my son's Optometrist Office, making it an understandable situation for the younger group when receiving the news of having to wear glasses and when doing so, the world around you becomes so much easier. Now the children visiting his office for check-ups go immediately to this book, sharing the story with their parents, over and over again. Great book, great story. "One Happy Camper!!!"
TCB in WA

We like to have books in our Family Eye Care Clinic for kids to read while they're waiting for the Doctor, it just seems fitting to have books about glasses/seeing the eye doctor. I found this book to be an exceptional book to have in the waiting area. We also have books like Arthur's Eyes, Glasses for D.W. and Good Luck Glasses...all three of these are also excellent.

Watch Video Here: http://www.amazon.com/review/R1C2DXV4W56AAS

About the Book: Men Don't Listen
is a very well written and easy to read book. It is a recipe book on how to make a very good relationship and keep it. The title of this book is a definite attraction for all female readers, but I truly advise both genders to read this book. It teaches women as well as men to stop, listen and learn all those little things that chip away at our relationships, after all, men and women alike spend so much time and worry in regards to healing their frustrations where their inability to understand their partner is concerned. Men Don't Listen has it all. This book will take its readers from A to Z in what steps are worth climbing to meet one another at a very equal level. One may consider this a self-help book in relationships. They would not be far from the truth, in fact it will even take away any false ideas that our world has managed to implement in your brain and take you to a realistic level of what men and women are really about. I enjoyed the romantic section of this book; it added a nice desert to the dinner so to speak.

Recommendation: Womensselfesteem.com highly recommends this read to all women and men regardless of your relationship. It is a very positive and informative book on living a very happy relationship. Thank you Wayne, for requesting a book review by womensselfesteem.com, it was a very entertaining, not to mention valuable read.

I feel this is a must book for both men and women but even more so for women to read. Women have an easier time expressing their feelings and needs and I feel this book will help them understand men better and give them the tools to help draw out the man in their life if they are having any problems communicating. I am presently going through a divorce after a very long marriage and I know if I would have read this book several years ago maybe I could have saved my marriage by knowing more about how my husband was thinking and not giving up because I could not get through to him and us growing apart. The book was written from the personal experiences of the author which makes it even more useful and practical information to learn and hopefully helps the reader not make the same mistakes in their lives. I know I have learned some valuable insight into a man's mind in reading this book that will hopefully help me in any future relationships I am lucky enough to have. Thank you Wayne for sharing your life with the rest of us in an effort to help us avoid the mistakes you made in your journey through life!

This book should be read by all men and women. There is something for everyone to take away from it. The list in the book are very helpful and gives you a place to start. Women if you can get your husbands to listen to you for one minute ask them to read this book it could very well change there whole thought pattern . I loved it. Great Job Wayne!

Ah, what a great book! Being involved in Relationship Workshops, I feel this book is absolutely a must to read by women as well as men. It certainly offers insight into the world of men who listen but have found it difficult to feel. Women you must read this book! It will give you a greater understanding of men. I will indeed suggest reading it at my Relationship Workshops. Pattimari Sheets

Bob Cassaro is my father.
My name is bret branon.
b@westparkfoundries.com
Yesterday was fathers day, and we didnt talk.
Sometimes I wish things were different.

An absolute must read for anyone interested in Viet Nam War History, flying and adrenaline. First hand stories from the pilots who flew recon and rescue missions in Nam. Repetitive? Absolutely not as each person tells his story, as it happened to him. You get a well rounded view of each mission. I couldn't put it down. It is an adrenaline rush just to read. Bess Carnahan

This book is, in my view, a companion to another book entitled "Bury Us Upside Down: The Misty Pilots and the Secret Battle for the Ho Chi Minh Trail." That book took a slice in time through the "Misty" mission and discussed the actions of a narrow group of flyers, apparently those with whom the author served and with whom he was most familiar. This book takes a broader view and essentially presents the complete history of "Commando Sabre," termed "Misty," as told by many of the men who flew in that top secret unit during the Vietnam War. As such, it is a valuable piece of military history and well worth reading.

The book did, however, come across as a little repetitive, but in all probability that couldn't be helped. For many of the stories were written in 1970, seemingly for some other purpose, while others were written in response to solicitations by the author/editor, apparently without specific guidelines (e.g., Don't tell us how the unit was formed or why, how many missions you had to fly in the back seat to qualify, etc.). Furthermore, since "Mistys" flew in pairs and when in heavy action were often supported or replaced by other Mistys, more than one story author often wrote about the same event from his own perspective.

Nevertheless, this is a great read, particularly for those interested in military history or the Vietnam War. For all others, I would suggest that you at least check this book out of the library and read the following excerpts: "A Trip to North Vietnam," by Don Jones (pgs. 162-170); "Combat Photographer," by Wells Jackson (pgs. 240-252); "Rescue in POL Valley," by Steve Amdor (pgs. 280-283); "What Was That?," by Bob Bryan (pgs. 306-309); "Tidbits," by Bob Cassaro (pgs. 314-319); "Gutsy Gunner," by Tony McPeak (pgs. 338-341); "War," by E. Lynn Farnsworth (pgs. 411-419); "The POWs" (pgs. 435-477); and "Then and Now," by P. K. Robinson (pgs. 523-537) These are the best written stories, and most are told in an entertaining way. They will give you the flavor of Misty and tell you much about the brave men who flew in the Vietnam War, in general, and those who flew in this top secret unit, in particular.

This is the companion book to "Bury me Upside Down". Any complaints that you might have about that book not staying on message are immediately dispelled in the more than 600 pages and 81 personal "stories" by the Misty pilots. The stories would seem fantastic if fictional, but these are real life stories. From the training in the US to the POW camps in Hanoi, from the multiple ejections to the "Mig sweeps" at the officer clubs, you will be fascinated by each person's stories. The references in the back are beyond useful. I found myself constantly flipping back to see what this pilot was doing today or who the other pilots were in his "generation" at Phu Cat.

And the ultimate farce of war is also present. Joseph Heller did not even com,e close to the truth in "Catch 22". When Colonels from Saigon would complain about the FACS getting their F-100 "damaged" by ground fire and write up the pilots and maintenance people for not taking better care of the US Government equipment, you had to wonder how we ever made any progress in that war.

If you want a read on what the "real" war was like for the US Air Force in Vietnam get this book and read it. You will not be disappointed.

This book is terrific, plain and simple. Any person interested in the courage and bravado of true fighter pilot heros in the VietNam War will be well-served reading this work.....you'll be glad you did!

A unique book that contains great principles and insights into building strong relationships... It is well worth the read.

Such a smart book! Marriage counselors married to each other, Maurice and Seanna are two unique people who have managed to craft a solid, lively relationship for themselves without giving up their individuality. In The New Couple they pass on their experience, strength, and hope to their clients and readers in an interesting and entertaining way. The material is beautifully organized into ten "new laws of love" that make wonderful sense. The book is intellectually compelling and emotionally sensitive...almost too much to ask of any book. (I could not get through the Mars/Venus stuff.)

I found The New Couple so upbeat and full of good advice that I attended a workshop presented by the authors. I left their presence feeling that a relationship is possible, and I've started dating again after ten years of terror at the prospect of repeating my past mistakes. This is nothing short of magic! Read this book, you won't regret it.

I am an avid but sceptical reader of relationship / couple books but it's hard to find anything to criticise in this one. I purchased this book when I decided I needed to clarify exactly what I wanted and needed in a relationship and it has literally become my relationship "bible".

If you want a very clear, simple and complete map for the route to a healthy relationship with both yourself (most important!) and a partner then click purchase now. It could just be the book that should be mandatorily handed to all people considering starting a relationship.

I was having problems with my husband and this book saved our marriage. The rules they present are so simple and clear. They make sense for today's relationships. I recommend this book for every single person and couple. Priceless!!!

Among relationship self-help books, this is one of the better titles of the moment. Taylor and McGee write in a breezy style and sow their text with a large number of example couples, which make their story readable if uninspired. Their forte, however, is the comprehensiveness of their list of rules and the reassuring common sense they must have used in developing them. While none of the rules are new and different individually, listing them in this comprehensive fashion is useful, and makes this book stand out as one of the better examples of the genre.