Abuse Books

Everyone should meet this inspiring lady. Compared to her shoes, the rest of us have had perfect lives. Reading her books, hearing her presentation and looking at her accomplishments lets you know how beautifully she has picked herself up and gone on. You would never know today she had all those issues with which to deal. An earthbound angel indeed. Thank you, Julia

Gail B

Julia Carroll experienced devastating abuse and shares her experiences without holding back. Her book demonstrates that even the most horrific harm can be healed and transformed and used for good. Julia's gifts are her love, her healing powers, her persistence and allegiance to the truth. This is both a dramatic story that makes you want to read all the way through to the end, as well as a workbook for healing. I can't imagine it not being helpful to anyone who's experienced sexual abuse and is struggling with the effects.

This is Julia's third book that (if not before) now totally separates itself from the rest of her work as an extremely important and powerful piece of work that anyone who has been in a similar situation can immediately identify with. If you are like me you did not have a personal experience of abuse child-hood, sexual, or otherwise, yet upon reading this book the feelings become blatantly clear and make the un-educated like myself instantly wizened to this most tragic of human events.

What I love most about this book is the candid `no hold's barred' approach to telling her personal story while yet remaining chaste and sensitive to the readers sensibilities. Another important and highly integral aspect of this book are the step by step practical applications for those who have undergone such an ordeal. There are fabulously crafted questions posited in one major section of the book allowing the reader who's been there to get it out of their system.

This book also offers sage advice and practical application for those wishing to treat--in a holistic manner--those who have been abused.

Even if you haven't had the experience yourself (and let's hope not!) this book will certainly enlighten its readers as to the warning signs and the ramifications of abuse that has gone unnoticed. This book, Harmed by Night, Healed by Light, is a public service to humanity and should be very well regarded.

I urge you as you read it to take Julia's messages to heart and expand your awareness so that other similar travesty's may never again take place.

-Scott Marmorstein
Author of "A Sparkling Aura ~ A Sparkling Life"
www.sparklingaura.com

Julia provides hope to those who have also experienced the pain of abuse. She is very inspiring to everyone who reads this book!

Katherine Woodhouse, MA, BCABA, ATC

Anyone wanting to make sense out of the cruelty perpetrated by both man and nature can take a recording device, interview strangers and friends, and put a range of experiences and opinions in an ordered perspective to understand the problems of diseases such as aids and hepatitis C. With a passionate coherence and the rhythmic writing of obvious concern, Michele Leight, in Harvest of Innocence uses research and viewpoint to show the inability and/ or unwillingness of global governmental, medical, and social institutions to help health systems reach deep into their societies to protect their young. She unravels strands from the knotted dynamic of cause expansion of and solution impediments to the aids crisis. Some of the impediments are technological: difficulties in efficient blood supply screening, and the delay between contraction and accurate testing for HIV. Many of the causes of these diseases's enormous global growth are the lack of medical institutions available for majority populations in many agrarian and authoritarian countries without resources as well as poor medical prison treatment in the democratic, industrialized countries with resources. Many other causes of increased reckless behavior are growing meth use, the sharing of nasal straws for cocaine, the lack of blood tests in many countries before marriage, men forced to look for work in cities who return infected to their village spouses, worldwide prostitution, and the predatory trafficking of children for sexual purposes. Her concern presents a maze of problems that face efforts to slow down aids and hepatitis C or, for that matter, any of many voracious and ravaging diseases. I recommend this book to anyone who shares her concern.

Each story introduces the reader to characters that can be our friend, neighbor, or family member and familiarizes you with very real and pertinent issues of AIDS, STD's, Virus's, without the melodrama that so often accompanies the more sensational media coverage. Ms. Leight's empathy and hopefulness comes through on each page and fills the reader with a sense of purpose. We can make a difference in the fight against diseases that each day claim the lives and quality of life of so many. One good first step is to share this book and its valuable information with people you care about!

"Harvest of Innocence" is a collection of gripping and stirring true accounts of people coping with risky behavior that is passionate and sobering. It looks at a lot of difficult issues about healthcare, AIDs, cultural issues and women's rights and argues effectively for early education about them. The stories it relates are cogent and searing and they are told with compassion and sophistication that will be compelling reading for young and old alike.

"Harvest of Innocence" helps us to understand that AIDS is NOT a disease of the past and that it still, unfortunately, exists today in modern countries. "Harvest of Innocence" is a moving book for those who think that it can't happen to their children, for those who want to help those who are more unfortunate than themselves, and for those who want to explain to their children or loved ones why more needs to be done. [...]

Even as the "survivor" of childhood abuse, this book gave me such insight into the "why's" of my personality as an adult. Not to use as an excuse, but to grow from the emotional pain of my past, into an emotionally healthy individual...

An Insightful look at the effects Child Abuse can have on a survivor, as well as a guide for those who love them in how best to contend with the ghosts of their past. Written with Compassion and Empathy while encouraging an emphatic approach to attaining a life well worth living. I know... I have indeed survived with this book at my side.

Because the body is the house of the soul, it should not be necessary to focus on abuse, either emotional or sexual - actually, one and the same, really, as limited only to females; many men are composites of enormous stress, unresolved conflict resolution, and highly leveraged disciplinary measures from childhood and indeed up until manhood. As I watched a parent today require his 2 year old son to remain sitting in the chair he was in (despite his son's drive to "move" consistent with nature's instinct and drive), I wondered how such patterns of restraint might affect him, and their relationship later. What messages were being sent by the father? What messages were received by the son? Beyond the fact of this dominance display, the reasons were frail if not inadequate to produce the mandate in this instance, although they are not always. The pattern was used throughout the day by both parents, and I wondered if they were trying to teach "patience, and self restraint" in so young a child who is little more than a bundle of energy, new to the possibility of moving, and hence, inspired by his new found ability. What happens to the desire to move when it is so abrubtly curtailed in so young a soul? When nature conflicts with man's desire to control nature, doesn't nature always find a different avenue of expression, some not so natural? Requiring a child to "stay," as if he were a pet may not be the ideal method to teach values or mechanics, but instead displays power that children are apt to emulate as they become adults. While safety is always an issue for children, convenience often supercedes the issues of safety and become the dominating factor in relationships instead, to the detriment of nature's logical progress, destroying the ability to reach the compromises characteristic of natural selection. Nature rarely destroys, but instead adapts.

This is easily the best of a dozen or so books I have worked through. It is defininately Christian in its approach, even if you do not hold this world view there is comfort and information for the spouse of a sexual abuse survivor.

This book ties for first place in my list of resources with Laura Davis's "Allies in Healing" (NOT a Christian work but excellent nonetheless). Spouses, you are not alone, unique or crazy! These volumes will help you grasp what your survivor is working through and give you help in dealing with the damage of sexual abuse (for yourself and the survivor).

Inner family arguments can truly be devastating and heart wrenching. "Heal & Forgive II: The Journey from Abuse and Estrangement to Reconciliation" is a guide for families to better deal with their conflicts. Richards draws on her own experiences and estrangement from her family for nearly a decade and a half. Saying that restoring family harmony requires efforts from all involved, "Heal & Forgive II" is a must for any at ends with a member of their immediate family.

It is always great to read of someone who has experienced abuse in childhood and has come to the place of forgiveness and reconciliation. The author went through a process to do this--it didn't come overnight. I would suggest, for those who have experienced child abuse, that they also get her first book Heal and Forgive, as well as find other books with various opinions and methods concerning healing and forgiveness. It helps to know what more than one person did to come to the place of forgiveness.

In Heal and Forgive II, Nancy Richards picks up where Heal and Forgive left off, taking us through the aftermath of divorcing a parent, from the judgment of friends and strangers, to the betrayal and abandonment of other relatives, from the shock to our equilibrium and mourning our losses, through standing firm in the truth and learning to parent ourselves, to arriving at the acceptance that allows us to heal and move on to a new life.

Whether you regard the idea of a family reunion with eager anticipation or numbing dread, Heal and Forgive II is a must-read for you. After many years of ministering to Adult Children of Abusive or Controlling Birth-Families, I would not advise anyone to even consider reuniting with their abusers without educating themselves on the pitfalls as well as the victories they might expect, and how to handle each one. In sharing her experiences, Nancy Richards gently guides us through the confusing jumble of conflicting thoughts, feelings, fears, and hopes involved in a possible reconciliation with our abusive families. Heal and Forgive II will educate you about the aspects of reconciliation you never even thought of, assist you in processing and understanding each one, and help you decide how to proceed next. An essential resource before taking that first step toward reconciliation, and an invaluable reference for every step along the bumpy path that will undoubtedly follow.

As a psychotherapist and expert on family estrangement issues, I strongly recommend Heal and Forgive 1 and II to those suffering from family cut offs. As a person who contends with a family who has cut me off, I doubly recommend this book because it helped me come to terms with my own estrangement in both practical and inspirational ways. Plus, it's a really good read. Nancy's story is compelling and one that all who are struggling with this issue will identify with and will provide reassurance about the possibilities of recovery.

This book has been a great guide for my own understanding, as the child of a substance dependant father, of how the many forms of addiction present themselves. From this text I received excellent descriptions of the short and long term affects of addiction and patient cases to match. Families that have members that struggle with addiction would benefit from incorporating this manual into their recovery plan. From it we gain insight based upon clinical evidence and a plan for overcoming the multiple forms of addiction.
There are many feel good books in publication but there are few like this one that are feel good, humbling, educational, guiding and define a path by which the patient and family should follow to recovery.

This is an incredibly comprehensive book that is easy to read and understand; it provides an outstanding resource that integrates multiple approaches to addiction and is equally as helpful to the general reader as to the addiction professional. It is a must have book for anyone who deals with family, friends, or patients with addiction problems.

This is the most comprehensive work on addiction and treatment modalities I have found. The authors are able to define the disease concept, multi-modality treatment, and the impact on society, without the "feel" of a textbook. Peter Martin's brilliance is made evident in this work. I am glad he decided to share his knowledge and insight in this manner. This book is a tool that should be required reading for anyone in the field of addiction treatment.

In this comprehensive yet easily read paperback volume, Dr. Peter Martin and colleagues distill the essential scientific theories of addiction psychiatry with the 70+ year old spiritual recovery movement. Their book answers questions about compulsive alcohol, drug, sex, gambling and food problems for addicts, their loved ones, and the counselors, ministers, physicians and psychiatrists who are trying to understand and change behaviors. The result is an up-to-date treatment manual for addiction disorders. It will be a valuable guide for sufferers and a useful resource for all professionals who wish to help!

I use this book for my survivors group and the group members love it. The best part is how the book promotes bonding among the group members. I have had nothing but good reports about this book from my clients. This book can also be used for other traumatic events in people's lives other than childhood sexual abuse. Thank you...

This book gives a clear, step-by-step method for therapists working with adult survivors of sexual abuse. The writing is basic and no-nonsense - an excellent guide for those working in the field.

As a group therapist who has faciliated time limited groups for over 12 years, I highly recommend and support the work of Bonnie Collins as outlined in this important book. Her program utilizes a structured 12 session group model that addresses all aspects of the group participants. Mind, body and spirit. Compassion, skill, tremendous sensitivity are woven into this treatment model. For example, Bonnie is aware of the normal anxiety of these women discussing such issues in public and in a group setting, that she has written material available for the group members upon walking into the first group session, as a way to bind some intial expected anxiety. The approach is not solely a cognitive one--the excercises outlines and suggested are often times experiential in nature. Well thought out and easilly read. I especially liked the handouts, assessment tools, and suggested letters offered at the end of the book. A must read for anyone working with this difficult issue in a group setting.

Bonnie Collins and Kathryn Marsh's book Healing for Adult Survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse: A 12-Session Group Treatment Program, published by Whole Person Associates out of Duluth, Minnesota is a wonderful model for professionals who choose to facilitate groups for survivors of incest. Although the book is written for adult survivors of Childhood Sexual Abuse, I feel it can be adapted to adolescent survivors as well. The user friendly style in which the guide is written allows for easy adaptation. The authors have thought of everything from the comfort of chairs chosen to experiential exercises to develop safety. They truly attempted to put themselves in the shoes (chairs) of the survivors they serve! Collins and Marsh start with the item survivors need most - SAFETY - an item that is taken for granted by many non-survivors! Choices are given at every turn - something that survivors may also see as very foreign. The survivor is in control of whether they contribute or not. Survivors need to hear that they have permission, even if it seems redundant. Ms. Collins and Ms. Marsh recognize their very important role of re-parenting and providing for a corrective emotional experience. Inner Child Work and the use of song/lyrics entitled How Could Anyone exemplify this process clearly. The anger releasing idea of throwing ice cubes into a bathtub sounds like it could be a winner in terms of getting the different senses involved with this process. It's also an affordable way to "rid the rage." The use of meditation and relaxation done in a structured, predictable way allows for the subtle implementation of spirituality and understanding that can offer healing on a different level to those who partake. The "earthquake" guided imagery exercise helps significant others of survivors. This visualization exercise may allow the respective parties to better understand what a survivor goes through, how a flashback may be elicited, or what it might look like. After reading this book, I have decided to use this model as a guide for the teenage survivors I work with. Don't miss out on the well developed insight and knowledge that Bonnie Collins and Kathryn Marsh put together to use in this sensitive, delicate and rewarding process. Such practical tools of this nature may take years for a therapist to collect. Here it is , all in one single book!

Andrea M. Binner, M.S. Ed., C.S.W. Supervisor of the P.A.C.T. Program Hamburg, New York

This book is a true gift to anyone wanting to heal not only from addictive patterns, but also on all levels of one's life. With compassion and open honesty, Lee Jampolsky shares many insights along with his own experience on healing from addictions to bring us to a better understanding of our true nature and how forgiveness can heal us at our very core. This is a must read for anyone wishing to live a happier life.

Lee's book is an extremely helpful account of not only what an addictive personality is, but also an honest look at addiction from his own personal experience. This will be helpful to everyone,as we are all addicted to something.I hope that it will be made available to rehabilitation services and recovery centres everywhere.

Healing the Addictive Personality is a great book for any one who wants to be happier and healthier. I have met with Lee Jampolsky. He helps me be a better person.

The book does a particularly good job of helping us understand the ways that our own biology as well as our own will help us determine our own peace of mind.

In my quest to have the life I want, I have found this book to be very helpful and I recommend it to everyone.

John Hoffmire

When we think of the word addictive, we think of drugs, alchohol... In this book the Author discusses addictive personality traits that surface as we go about our day. Many of us don't realize the addictions we carry around with us. This book is amazing! I think that anyone who wants to hold healthy conversations with their loved ones on a regular basis and implement a true sense of happiness into their daily activities and events must run out and grab this book!

The tape works. It is the first time I have used a tape in my effort to quit smoking. It is also the first time I have successfully stopped smoking for any length of time (6 weeks) and successfully NOT wanted to smoke.

I ordered this guided-imagery tape(I like to call them my personal GI's - heehee) and some others directly from Belleruth's website a few months ago. I listened to this one, one for self-confidence, and one for "general wellness" all around the same time, alternating. I listened to the Smoking more at first, then the General Wellness towards the end. About over a month ago, I got mononucleosis - like a bugger flu that just DOESN'T want to go away - and on April 6th I didn't feel like smoking. Initially I thought it was because I was so sick (funny was, it never stopped me before! I know you KNOW what I mean.)

Today is April 23rd, and I still haven't smoked! I have hardly any cravings, the intervals between them were/are surpringly huge. Even coffee is comfortably bearable; alcohol however, is not.(all in stride I suppose) Not like in 1994 when I quit though, it was 4 months of terror, nightmares, and rollercoaster rides and sweaty palms! But this...? This I cannot explain. I bought the tapes originally while looking for something else actually, and bought them on a whim. Glad I did.

I can't say whether it was the tapes or not, but all I can say is, this non-smoking thing just came and decided to stay. Which I think is pretty swell. :) And her voice.....is so classic. Something very earthy and natural about it. The other side of the tapes/CDs are filled with affirmations. I find both equally supportive, and I can use either depending on which kind of mood I am in. All in all, I listened to them at will for about 2 month's time before this non-smoking thing happened to me. Pretty cool if you ask me.

Withing three days of listening (twice a day) to this tape, my life underwent a marvelous healing. The tape far exceeded my expectations. Wonderful narration and beautiful orchestration combine to give a delightful empowering interlude. Highly recommend~!!

Hi, this is Angie (Berlin, Germany), the lady who left the message two down...

It is September 2002, and I STILL DON'T SMOKE. I'm impressed! :) I still do listen to her other tapes as well and have since passed mine on to friends who wanted to quit. I still do believe in this product of Belleruth's and I hope you all trying to ween yourselves of "Dark mother's Smokey Teet" (a line from Gunter in "Friends") will feel inspired to grab for this instead. ;) Good luck! You can do it!

This text should be helpful to professionals and treatment providers who need additional guidance on specific methods to uncover and discern addiction and compulsive behaviors. Often addictions are located within complex, intraindividual series of defenses that can make the "abnormal appear normal" The author makes clear that the treament of addictions of various sorts does not have to be a series of battles or interpersonal confrontations, rather beneficial outcomes are possible with these challenging populations.

Freimuth does an extraordinary job of speaking to both the inexperienced individual with an interest in learning more about addiction and the seasoned professional who treats addiction regularly. The prose is rich and informative, yet easy to read and entertaining. For those who would like to learn more about addiction, this book will teach you. For those who already know about addiction, this book will fill in gaps and answer questions you didn't even know you had. I recommend it to clients who would like to learn more about addiction as well as colleagues who work in addiction treatment.

The book is enjoyable, thoughtful, informative, and offers an array of clinical examples. Dr. Freimuth does a nice job of addressing varying theoretical perspectives, diagnostic and clinical ambiguities, and therapeutic process/relationship factors. The information provided is helpful in developing case conceptualizations and considering various treatment interventions.

Kudos to the author for this wonderful clinical resource.

"This book is as academic as a serious textbook needs to be
but it is also very readable, practical and persuasive. Its
purpose is to help professionals and graduate students
who work in the mental health field to uncover and deal
with those addictive behaviours that are hidden behind a
mountain of other problems....The book should move a
pre-contemplative psychotherapist
through contemplation to action with just one
bound; but why only psychotherapists? This book should
have a wider readership. Uncovering and dealing with
hidden addictions would improve the practice of most
health professionals and social workers." Quoted from Addiction,101, 2006, p.1369 Reviewer Ray Hodgson

In the Hired Hand, Donna Scott tells the story of a woman sexually abused by her pastor. Part One tells The Setup: the issues that brought Renee to pastoral counseling, details of how Pastor Smith sexualized their counseling sessions, an explanation of the danger signals that might have alerted Renee if she had not been wounded and trusting of her pastor, a look inside the head of the hired hand contrasted with that of a good shepherd, and words to clergy exhorting them to not harm those who turn to them for healing and to not ignore other pastors who do.

In Part Two, Disclosure and Denial, we learn what happens when a woman tries to report her abuse. Scott explains the denial by the abuser, the denial by others, and the distortions of reality blaming the victim for what has happened. She devotes several pages to explaining why, although she is an adult, no woman who has gone to her pastor for counseling can ever give consent to a sexualized relationship and why she is never at fault. She quotes the ethics statements of five national professional organizations: psychologists, psychiatrists, counselors, marriage and family therapists, and Christian counselors. Each forbid any sexual contact between their members and those they serve. She ends this section with why pastors try to pass the buck instead of accepting responsibility for what happened, what God has to say about those who abuse, and words to clergy and congregations.

Part Three is devoted to The Aftermath, discussing in detail how the victim is impacted by the abuse: guilt, impaired ability to trust, ambivalence, emptiness and isolation, emotional volatility, suppressed anger, sexual confusion, increased suicidal risk, role reversal and boundary disturbance, and cognitive dysfunction.

The book concludes with an Afterward, endnotes, a bibliography, and an extensive resource list including books, videos, organizations, and support groups.

So few people understand the necessity for equality in power in order for sex to be consensual. Ms. Scott does and she says it over many times in this book. Let's send copies to Hillary, who refers to her husband's "affairs". Let's send copies to all the reporters who refer to abused parishioners as having had "affairs" with their pastors. Let's give copies to all the Catholic bishops who think only children can be abused by priests. Let's make copies available to members of congregations whose pastor has abused women. Let's give copies to our family, friends and neighbors, and let us pray they read them!

...I thank God for inspiring Ms. Scott to write such an honest and true book about what happens when a trusted man of the cloth betrays a congregant. Words cannot express the devastation the victim and her family experience when a pastor crosses boundaries....The victim becomes the scarlet harlot and the perpetrator (pastor/ex-pastor) often garners sympathy and pity from the congregation. Ms. Scott has done an excellent job of shedding the true light on this type of abuse. I applaud her for "speaking" for thousands of us who have been victimized in our "houses of faith" and still cannot speak publicly for ourselves because of the continued pain, embarassment, humiliation, and intimidation we experience. She offers us encouragement and hope. If you truly want to find out what it means to be sexually abused by a pastor/priest/rabbi, read Ms. Scott's book. She speaks the truth. To those professionals who are entrusted with seeking the truth, preventing this type of boundary violation, and providing recovery services to victims and families, please wake up and take your responsibility seriously. Stop the sinful secrets, lies, and cover-ups in our churches. Thank you, Ms. Scott, for your bravery in providing this thought provoking and credible resource.

The Hired Hand, by Donna E. Scott, is an honest and well written book about clergy sexual abuse. I am a survivor of such abuse and I believe her observations and conclusions to be just and revealing. I was particularily drawn to the parts where Ms. Scott reports how many church families (secondary victims) respond badly to the primary victims. I loved and trusted my church family. They, however, made me the scapegoat for the losses they suffered when the silence was finally broken. To this day, 2 and 1/2 years after I broke the silence, many continue to harass me in my place of work. Ms. Scott's book gives me a feeling of not being alone in that regard.

Ms. Scott begins by drawing a distinction between two types of leaders based on John 10. One is the Good Shepherd and as such represents all that is good and to be honored and trusted in our clergy. The other is the Hired Hand. Ms. Scotts book needs to be read to give a clear picture reguarding the manner in which the vulnerable are manipulated by the hired hand. Hired hands rape souls and steal lives. This book is a window through which the reader can "see" how boundary violations happen. It also allows the reader to look inside the head of these cunning thieves.

This is a book for both primary and secondary victims. It is a "must read" for church leaders many of whom remain unfortunately uneducated to the issues involved in clergy sexual abuse. It contains much information as to how a church may validate the primary victims as well as heal from the trama they, themselves, endure when the trusted clergy betrays that trust. Ms. Scott reminds us all, that clergy wear a collar that says "I am trustworthy" that "I speak for God" and the wounding which occures when trusted clergy are revealed as the predators they are, is devistating to all the victims.

I have read dozens of books on the subject, but The Hired Hand most accurately describes and discusses the problems that occur when a clergyman in power brings harm to one of his sheep through sexual boundary violation. Author Donna Scott speaks with authority and compassion about the feelings and events that the victim and church is likely to face. By following the life events of one victim, she speaks for all victims and does something many other similar books do not do - she offers hope of survival and recovery from this awful trauma. I would recommend it to EVERYONE in a congregation that has faced clergy sexual misconduct. It would also be helpful to any shepherd who wants to truly care for and protect his sheep.