Abuse Books

This is a must have for any parenting library. Well researched advice and various options for depression. I wish I had this book before the birth of my son. This could literally be a lifesaver for someone!

Depression is a common and normal response to major life stressors (including pregnancy, birth, and becoming a mother). This common illness has many negative consequences for the development and well-being of both mothers and their children. Because up to 20% of women will become clinically depressed in their first year postpartum, it is imperative that health care providers be able to identify women at risk of developing postpartum depression and refer them to the treatment they need and deserve. Thoroughly referenced and filled with the experiences of real women, Dr. Kendall-Tackett's excellent book, Depression in New Mothers, provides exactly the information needed to do this. As a mental health care provider who is also an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant, I cannot recommend this book highly enough.

This book is a "must" for any health care professional who works with new mothers. Dr. Kendall-Tackett cites research to back up every statement she makes. One might think that this would lead to a useful, though dry, book - but this is not the case. Depression in New Mothers is an interesting and valuable read. Highly recommended to anyone who helps new mothers in any way.

This book perfectly fills a gaping hole in the professional literature regarding depression in new mothers. Dr. Kendall-Tackett's exploration of the topic is comprehensive, well-cited, and recognizably accurate. Professionals and clinicians who work with new mothers will be exceptionally well-served to have this tremendous resource on their bookshelves. It is of such immediate practical usefulness that they are likely to find that their copies are well-thumbed and dog-eared in short order.

Diana West, IBCLC

If, like me, you work with women during the perinatal period, this book is an essential resource. As an expert in the field, Dr. Kendall-Tackett has the experience, the familiarity with the research, and the perspective to explain clearly to the rest of us what we need to know, and she does it in a clear, easy-to-understand format. In this book, she debunks common myths (for example, that postpartum depression is mostly hormonal), explains risk factors, assessment tools, and treatments--including both prescribed and herbal medications and their compatibility with breastfeeding. She also discusses possible long-term effects of both negative and traumatic childbirths and provides specific approaches for helping women process these experiences so that they can learn from them and move on. This is a book I will turn to often in my work. I highly recommend it!

"The journey to healing from an abusive childhood is often fraught with difficulties. Kimberly Steward relates her experiences in The Doghouse Angel, telling her story through counseling sessions reflecting back to her earlier years as one of eighteen children. There are many portions of this book that are heartbreaking to read. But for those who have experienced similar situations, this book shows that healing can occur. The Doghouse Angel should be required reading for counselors, pastors, and others who deal with abused children and with adults still traumatized by their childhood. Kimberly Steward's insights bring the dark secret of abuse into the light."
Review courtesy of www.BookLoons.com, see BookLoons for complete review.

The Doghouse Angel is honest and moving. It helps you access your compassion for other's and see your own struggles with a new perspective. Very powerful for such a short book.

It was surprising to read the author's descriptions and to find myself and other people I've known and places I've heard of and stories they've told. Crimes I've lived through, heard rumors of and imagined. Tragic homes built by people too young, too ignorant, too sick or too hateful to possess the tools needed to craft healthy and happy ones.

It may be enough to stand aside a place we cannot fathom and simply admire the woman who has the courage to describe its horrors. Author Kimberly Steward has earned this here. Her history is, hopefully, the most remarkable readers will ever know.

But it is so much more when you read a book and find yourself literally looking around to see if anyone has noticed you are sitting there naked. Recognizing in it the thoughts you had and the lessons you learned and the hope you dared and the prices you paid for all of it. This book is intimate and personal and painful and triumphant. I wept for this bouquet too big for most to hold-black and blue and awful flowers grown from tiny seeds too many of us held ourselves. It is a grand and unique example that shouts what untold numbers whispered and whisper still.

Read it if you are a therapist or a counselor who deals with physical, emotional and sexual abuse and the myriad results impacting its perpetrators, victims and survivors. Read it if you work with young people who may need you to lend them a voice they cannot find for themselves. Read it if you or someone you love has ever felt the filthy hands of incest or molestation upon them. Read it if you can be inspired by strength and reminded of how grace and the human spirit pulls for the children who know too much too soon and survive, often thrive, in spite of the dreadful odds before them. I truly can't think of anyone for whom this does not apply. This woman is an inspiration and I hope you'll gift yourself with her story.

"Powerful" and "Inspiring" are the words most often used by those I speak to who have read "The Doghouse Angel". Many of my friends in our book club, quilting groups and at church knew of my friendship with the author and read the book as soon as it came out. Because they knew something of Kimberly's childhood they were a little apprehensive but quickly became publicists themselves. "She has so many positive things to say after such terrible experiences. I am amazed that she is able to do that."
"What you have just said is the reason she wrote the book and the reason so many people will benefit from reading it," is my reply. People in the healing professions will find the book a valuable resource. As a former foster parent and teacher, I know that, if you have had abusive experiences which still trouble you, or know others in similar situations, you should read "The Doghouse Angel" to see that there are steps to take to heal.
Barbara Kapost, B.S.Ed

I found this book to be a very big eye opener into the lives of abused children.It is amazing what these 18 children endured thru their entire childhood.Yet the author seems to have been able to overcome it all and help others who may suffer as she did.God Bless the little children, may they never have to endure what Kimberly had to.I think this book shows there is light at the end of the tunnel.

I picked this book up at random and was quickly drawn in. This is a poignant and powerful memoir, told with style. The narrative is haunting and as stirring as anyone could expect when the subject is the author's own son. I was impressed with both Morris' story and with her strength and persistence. I thought the telling was very good; the story is so intense, it makes me wonder how I might have held up under such circumstances. Let's just say, you really get drawn in to a marvelous read as the events unfold.

This is an unsentimental yet heart rending account of a nightmare decade one family lived through. Any one of the agonising episodes described would be too much to bear for most but, in an almost unsettlingly calm voice, Ros Morris describes the unrelenting nature of bi-polar disorder coupled with drug abuse and the ripples it sends out. Highly readable and beautifully written, I cried and laughed whilst I raced through it in two sittings. Don't Wait for Me: How a Mother Lost her Son to Bipolar Disorder and Drug Abuse
If you're dealing with or have ever dealt with a mental health or drug abuse issue, you should read this book. If you are a spouse, parent or sibling to someone with a mental health issue, you should read this book. If you have any interest in mental health issues or drug abuse, you really should read this book. If you have a heart and an interest in how human relationships can survive and overcome the most terrible tests, then read the book.

I thought I would find this book hard to read and that I wouldn't want to see it through to the end, but to my surprise, it made for compelling reading. It is a heart-breaking look into the life of both the sufferer and the impact it has on the family members who have to deal with him. Ros Morris is braver than she knows.

I would recommend this book not just to people who have a similar family situation, but to the wider society at large so that we might have a better appreciation of the torment of mental disease.

Dont Wait for Me provides a painful and heart-rending window into the lives of a family struggling with their loved one's mental illness and drug addiction. Morris is able to write about this saga with real grace and insight that made it an amazing read. She is a talented writer, and while the subject matter can at times be hard to deal with, this book was well worth the read.

Times Literary Supplement, London
"More than a misery memoir, this book sheds light on responsibility, friendship and what it means to be human. What resounds most in this book is not abnormality, but the persistent friendship and compassion shown to a youngster who frequently rejects it. Although her subject matter is dark, Morris's overriding tone is one of hope about humanity."

Daily Record, Scotland
"An informative and eye-opening book. Will give you an invaluable insight into the world of the sufferer's family."

Michael Palin
"I really hope the book does well."

Trisha Goddard
"I thoroughly recommend this book... gripping reading."

Andrew Loog Oldham
"Ros Morris has written a very brave book. She opens her front door and painstakingly and eloquently lets you into the heart and soul of her family."




'A lucid, searingly compelling book that lays bare, in all honesty, the highs and lows of Bipolar Disorder. Beautifully written, it is a shocking account of the tragic state of mental health organisation in the twenty first century.'

'A powerful and moving description of the effect of this debilitating and misunderstood disease.'

'Written with a sensitive, heartfelt sincerity.'

'A compulsive read for all those working in mental health.'

'It took several days before I had the courage to open the first page and started reading but I soon found that I could not put it down which, to tell the truth, is very rare occurrence.'

How many of us wear a social mask, putting forth the façade, the face of what we want others to see? The title of this novel is well suited to the story itself. From the moment that sweet young Becky meets handsome and rich Bob Dillough, she's swept along on a romantic tsunami that promises she'll live happily ever after. Becky's "prince", however, is far from perfect.

Although Bob wines and dines his young bride, he is severely flawed. He drinks too much, lies, cheats on Becky and has more excuses than a tardy high school student. As Bob's behavior turns increasingly violent, Becky starts looking for a way out of her predicament, even though she is assailed by guilt for her failing marriage. I held my breath when Bob literally shoved a gun into Becky's face! For a few terrible moments, her life hung in the balance. Thankfully, Becky was able to escape Bob's clutches and this book is a strong statement against domestic violence and abuse in all its forms. What makes The Door of Façade all the more compelling is that it is a true story - Becky's story. I can't wait to read her second novel to learn the good news!

Becky Conrad's story is a real page turner. Becky tells her story with great emotion, humor, and honesty. This book brought me great hope for a brighter future, and brought me out of a very dark place in my life. This book is a must read to all women. I admire Becky for sharing her horrific story in hopes of touching someone else's life. I know her mission was accomplished.

This book is truly amazing. I commend Becky for her courageousness and bravery. She endured horrific circumstances, and she was still able to rise above. The book is very well written with the intense protrayal of her life. I am a advocate for victims of domestic violence, and I highly reccomend this book to anyone who has suffered from a domestic situation. Also, the family members of the victim would benefit greatly from this book. They can actually feel the agony of an abused person. Everyone on the other side needs to seek some understanding, and this book will allow them to do that. I can't wait for the sequel!

I READ THE BOOK, AND THEN MY ENTIRE FAMILY READ IT. WE JUST KEPT PASSING IT AROUND. IT WAS WELL WRITTEN AND I WOULD TELL ANYONE TO BUY THIS BOOK IF THEY HAVE EVER KNOWN ANYONE WHO HAS BEEN ABUSED OR IS NOW A VICTIM OF ABUSE.
NOT ONLY IS IT A GOOD BOOK TO READ, BUT IS HELPFUL TO THOSE WHO LIVES ARE TOUCHED BY VIOLENCE OR ABUSE. BE SURE TO READ HER SEQUEL WHEN IT COMES OUT.

I could not put this book down. It was amazing reading of this womans life and Becky Conrad is such a good writter that I was able to get a great feel for each character. Even if the topic doesn't relate to your life I would recomend reading this just for the enjoyment. I look forward to more wonderful books by Becky Conrad!!

My son went through this program and brought this book back for the family to read. I ended up ordering a copy from Amazon and had him pick up several more copies when he went back for his recap. Every person who has a problem with alcohol or who has a family member who has a problem, should read this book. It vividly describes an amazing journey with a very happy ending. Kathleen is a warm wonderful woman who will answer your email immediately and who is an inspiration to all she meets. My son was so impressed with her. She leaves nothing to the imagineation in "Drink Up." Her descriptions of a rather brutal, but pretty miraculous program left me with nothing but admiration for all who go through it. It is hard, but, man, is it worth it.

I don't remember how I came across this book, but I purchased it and like many on the topic of alcohol, it sat under my bed many nights before I opened it up. At first I opened it up in the middle and just read a little here and there. I became so engrossed in this lady's experience that I had no choice except to start from the beginning. It was a difficult book to put down. After reading this book, I began to investigate Schick Hospital. Could it be a real place? Was their success rate for real? I hadn't openly admitted to having a problem with alcohol before reading Drink it Up!, but by the time I was done I began to visualize myself going through this treatment facility.

Within three months of reading it I had checked myself into Schick Shadel Hospital; the months leading up to my being admitted Kathy's journal was of great comfort because I could pick it up and read it to help set expectations of what I was about to undergo. Kathy S described the facility perfectly and the warmth of the staff wasn't exaggerated at all. I think I am really lucky to have come across this book and this hospital as my very first attempt at sobriety. I am sober and I know I will never drink again. The enjoyment I have in life and in relationships today without alcohol is beyond words, and my fantastic journey began by reading this book.

If you or someone you know is questioning their use of alcohol, give them this book to read. Even if Schick isn't for them, this book will definitely give them a great deal of relatable information to further their education on the topic of alcoholism.

This book is incredible! A very brave and determined woman honestly and graphically chronicled her successful journey from alcohol addiction to an induced and lasting aversion to drinking. This story gives hope to the hopeless. This method is not for everyone, but for those who are ready to meet this huge challenge, here is a unique path to recovery. Drink Up! is a must read for everyone struggling with addiction.

Kathy S. and her journal have brought to light many things concerning problems with drinking that have been hidden with shame by many who suffer from this stigma-filled problem. How freeing it has been to know I am not alone! Somehow, the honesty and humor in her walk through recovery has made mine manageable and I have turned this corner with relief and gratitude to her. I have read and highlighted it over and over as it helped me understand why I don't drink like everyone else. With that knowledge comes power, even for those who are unable to go to Shick Shadel. I have retired my drinking for the last time, thanks to this book by Kathy S.

What a great book! I too was lucky enough to be able to visit this "little hospital that could." And yes- I am sober today. This book so accurately describes Schick's unusual treatment- the day to day experience- the incredible relationships with staff and fellow patients. If you are suffering from an addiction and AA or other 12 step programs haven't worked- read this book! Enlightening and informative, funny and enjoyable. Excellent job Kathy - I loved reading about your journey.

You don't have to be physically raped to feel raped. What more can I say. A man can feel raped by a woman. Emotional rape can go on for years. Psychological rape. It can be mothers on their sons. What's sad is when neither party is objectively aware of what is happening or has happened.

I have had several long term relationships end in my life and had bounced back. I just could not not put my finger on why my most recent relationship has devastated me. I read every book I could get my hands on regarding relationships, love, bereavment etc nothing really spoke to me. It is such a relief to finally put something tangible with what I have been through. This book is my bible. I am so grateful to have finally found the answers and understanding to what has happened to me. Thank god I found it.

I wouldn't know where to start... this book has been more helpful than The Bible and all my counseling sessions combined.

It goes into detail how we all have basic needs as human beings that are being exploited by the rapist. Having been emotionally raped is no more our fault than dying of drinking from a well that has been poisoned by someone else - we were merely attempting to quench our natural thirst and, because we could not have possibly known better at the time, picked the wrong well.

What amazes me is that the author does not appear to have a degree in psychology at all, yet this book seems so much smarter and to-the-point in describing what has really happened than what I have been hearing from "the experts".

I highly recommend this book. I wish more therapists would read it.

Worth its weight in gold.

This book is a must for those who are questioning about the possibility of an Emotional Rape in their life or want to learn about such a traumatic event. But, it is not only a must, but also a lifeline for those who have been Emotional Raped. I have lived and experienced the "pages" in this book and I am an Emotional Rape victim. My core was raped and I was left traumatized and devastated. Without this book, I would not have known what it is, the resulting trauma, and that a recovery process existed. It is so well written. The pages of my book are folded, written on, and falling out. This book is nothing short of a lifeline and has become one of my enduring support references. For all you victims, I honor your courage.

I was abused by my narcissitic mother, and entertained the thought about killing myself for about 10 years.

Although I almost recovered, I still fear people.

This book taught me who I should be wary of to avoid being hurt again. Among many advices in this book about healing methods, ones I found true were laughter, avoidance of evil people, helping others, and religion.

Ending the Tobacco Holocaust gives people who are tired of their friends' preventable deaths the most recent tobacco research and then gives practical ideas on how to stop the efforts of Big Tobacco. When one or two babies die from lead poisoning, there are immediate product recalls. However, 1200 people needlessly die every day from a using a product that, when used exactly as directed, kills people! We need to be enraged enough to do something to stop this! I particularly liked that the author gave personal stories because those 1200 people who died today can no longer tell their stories about their addiction to tobacco. This is a must read for any tobacco activist!

While those who smoke are acutely aware that what they're doing isn't healthy, denial runs strong in this, and any, addiction. My experience tells me that a major factor in this denial is shame.
Dr. Rabinoff's book evoked in me not shame, but rather anger as I became aware once again of the carefully choreographed effort by tobacco companies to continue to line thier overstuffed pockets with no regard to the human consequence. Let's face it, this is an emotional issue for all concerned (except apparently the tobacco companies who seem devoid of the capacity to feel any emotion at all), and emotion feels to me to be a much more effective motivation to quit than fear or shame. This book has awakened in me an anger that has caused me to look at my own nicotine addiciton in a much different way, to direct my attention not at beating myself up, but rather at exercising my own personal freedom from corporate manipulation and greed. That's a significant shift, and a shift which, it is my hope, will change the course of my life.

Dr. Rabinoff has written shocking, mind-numbing book about the insidious intrusion of a multi-billion dollar industry into our lives, intent on addicting us to a product that slowly kills. It is a hard book to read because the carnage is so overwhelming. Over 400,000 people in America die each year due to the effects of smoking! And yet this addiction has been so carefully ingrained into our culture, that almost no one cares. Except, for sure, Dr. Rabinoff.

It's a book to be taken in small doses, maybe one chapter a day. If you're a non-smoker you become fearful and outraged over the effects of second-hand smoke. To see the picture of a little toddler smoking in China is revolting. So it is a hard book to read. But we are sometimes a society in denial, and I recommend you read this book.

Thoroughly comprehensive, readable, not just the usual screed, but packed with astonishing details (Kent cigarettes used filters made out of asbestos -- and touted the health benefits?!?!) and lots of interesting sidebars. Wonderful book to add to the arsenal against this modern epidemic. For smokers and non-smokers alike.

I appreciated this reader-friendly book on how smoking affects us all. This is the definitive book on smoking where you can find a wealth of information in one place. It is informative about the toxic chemicals added to cigarettes, the deceitful marketing tactics of the tobacco industry; the health hazards of smoking to the smoker, the non-smoker and even to our pets and important methods for smoking cessation. I also found the personal stories scattered throughout the book to be very compelling. I recommend this book to anyone who wants to stop needless suffering.

Our current administration is fond of dismissing its critics by labeling THEM as extremists. The Whitewater investigators are part of a "right-wing conspiracy." Those who criticize the under-the-desk-activities at the Oval Office are simply venting their wrath against people from Arkansas, and those who oppose the failed War on Drugs are "fringe groups."

With each passing day, this tactic becomes harder to get away with, as "fringe" types such as George Schultz, Walter Cronkite and Perez de Cuellar weigh in against the Drug War. The latest of these "fringe" elements to come out against our idiotic drug policy is Dirk Chase Eldredge, a founding bank director, "successful entrepreneur," and former co-chairman of Ronald Reagan's campaign for governor of California.

This conservative Republican has examined our drug policies in considerable detail. He details the failures of the Justice Department, FBI, US Customs Service, and others in their futile quest for a "drug-free America."

He clearly points out the horrendous effects of these policies on our country: the overcrowded prisons, police corruption, violence, spread of AIDS, unjust sentencing, judicial overload, and the tyranny of asset forfeiture.

Some months ago, I was having a drink with Judge Jim Gray, an Orange County, California, Republican running for Congress, and I asked him how he broaches the subject of the Drug War to his conservative constituents. "Easy," he replied. "I just say, `let me tell you about an $18 billion federal program that doesn't work,' and they're all ears." That is just what Eldredge does in "Ending the War on Drugs." He gives us just the facts, Ma'am. Those facts are the key to effective policy, and Eldredge has plenty of them.

There is, however, a human note to his opus, too. Eldredge points out that his father's life was ruined by his addiction to alcohol, and that what he needed was help from medical people, not law enforcement. Eldredge is also quick to point out that the vast majority of drinkers, unlike his dad, do not have a problem with alcohol. Likewise, he says, "Ninety-six percent of people use drugs today, use them recreationally, without harming anyone."

Eldredge also gives lie to the "Try and Die" is another myth promoted by Prohibitionists. In the preface, Eldredge says, "America's War on Drugs is reminiscent of the Russian princess who sat weeping profusely at the death of the hero in a performance at the opera, while, at the curb, her waiting carriage driver froze to death in a Moscow ice storm." He understands the inherently dishonest nature of the Drug War and makes an excellent case for ending it.

If I have a quarrel with anything in this book, it is with his solution, or at least part of it. There are three possible administrators of the multi-billion-dollar drug market in the US - the free-market, the government, and the underworld. Currently, our policy-makers obviously favor giving control to the underworld. Ending the Drug War would leave us two choices; the free-market or the government. Eldredge favors the latter, in the form of state-run stores akin to the alcohol sales system in Pennsylvania, Ohio, and other states. While this is an obvious improvement over turning the market over to the Mob, as we do today, I'm surprised that a self-proclaimed conservative Republican would opt for this Socialistic solution. A more effective system of state-regulated but privately owned "drug stores" would seem to be a better way to go. We are still a long way from either of these solutions, and have ample time to debate which one will prevail. Hopefully this book will hasten the time when that decision will have to be made.

Mr. Eldridge presents us with a very well writen critiqe of our nations stance against drugs. The book is full of insight into ways that the war on drugs can be put to better use. anyone interested in drug public policy should read this book.

The most knowledge packed 200 pages on Drug War circumstance I have ever read. I highly recommend this book to anyone interested in politics and especially on the War on Drugs. The author is incitive and extraordinarly objective in his discussion. I read the book in one sitting and immediately searched to find more books by Eldredge. Though an ex Reagan man (campaign for CA governor) his views show a fairly liberal view on the topic, far away from any Reagan stereotypes. Too much good to discuss here, just read it!

Dirk Chase Eldredge's "Ending the War on Drugs" is a powerful and persuasive book that argues that America's war on drugs has been an abysmal failure and should be ended as soon as possible. The author's message has a certain edginess in that he is one of a small but albeit growing number of Republicans who are weighing in against the drug war. Of particular note, Eldredge was co-chairman for the California Gubernatorial campaign of Ronald Reagan, who was perhaps the nation's most vocal drug warrior. Yet there wasn't a single word in this book that I could disagree with.

Eldredge is encouraging us to act like grown-ups and provide the caring and compassion that drug abusers need. Through the use of numerous statistics that are supplemented by some interesting anecdotes, the author overwhelmingly shows that interdiction has failed. The bottom line is that illegal drugs remain readilly available to those who seek them. But their illegal status has proven to be a boon to the drug lords, street gangs and other undesirable elements -- including Afghan terrorists, as we have recently learned -- who are attracted to the promise of quick and (usually) easy profits.

Edlredge contends that de-criminalization will swiftly take away the profit motive and bust up the drug gangs, both here at home and in places like Columbia and Mexico. Safer streets will enhance the quality of life for our citizens and no doubt help stablize the governments of countries where drug lords are nearly as powerful as the state. And for the user, government distribution will ensure a safer supply of drugs and, importantly, provide the drug user with a point of contact who could arrange treatment, should it ever be requested.

Eldredge's discussion of the nuances of how the anti-drug laws should be changed and the types of programs that need to be implemented show that he has spent a fair amount of time carefully considering the issue. But Eldredge takes care to critique the drug war in terms familiar to most Conservatives: as an example of wasteful government spending. If criminalizing drugs is not working as a deterrent to behavior patterns, and if it does not suppress the supply, then the government should logically search for alternative solutions where it may be able to get a better return on its investments.

One hopes that the mature message found in this book will be heeded by a growing number of policy makers. I encourage you to read it and to join the growing number of Americans who think that sanity and clarity of purpose should rightly replace the current state of insanity and corruption that unfortunately characterizes our country's current drug war strategy.

In Ending the War on Drugs, Dirk Eldredge provides an insightful and convincing look at the full gambit of issues surrounding our perceptions of drugs in this society. He succeeds masterfully in proving that we must reexamine our "War on Drugs." I believe anyone wishing to make an informed and educated opinion about our public policy toward illicit drugs should read this book. It is my hope that this book will help spark a fresh debate on what we might do to stem the tide of horrors our drug prohibition has brought not only to our society, but also to the global economic and political landscape. While many may disagree about his proposed solution, namely the federally controlled distribution of what would be newly legalized drugs, few could argue his conclusion that our attempted "War on Drugs", has been a absolute failure.

The book is comprehensive, well-researched, and well-presented. I did learn a lot from the book, and I would recommend this book to other people beginning recovery from SA. The book talks about the ten types/stages of courtship and how sexual addiction can affect an addict, so you can diagnose yourself and where you're having difficulties from the charts. It also talks about how slips are like boulders falling off a hill, and there's a great illustration to explain that and how bottomlines can help you.

What was missing for me, and hence the 4 stars, was the lack of content regarding "Relationship Recovery" part. There isn't much indication on how to go about dating the right way for S&L addicts - for example, if you saw the chart and realized you have problems with "seduction" phase of the courtship, you know you have this, but the book doesn't help you to revert this, or suggest what you're supposed to do with the diagnosis, other than "abstinence".

I would say this is a great resource for Sex Addicts in Recovery, but if you are a Sex AND Love Addict in recovery - this book won't fulfill all your needs. I don't know; perhaps Carnes has written a separate book for Love Addiction that I haven't checked out yet.

I would say I'm about 85% satisfied with the information provided by the book, and roughly 70% satisfied with the purchasing of this book.

This author (Patrick Carnes) is the most knowledgable person on the topic of Sexual Addiction. This book is good for people who like to have a workbook. There are a lot of quizzes and journaling places, so you can really get to the bottom of your problems. If you are not going to want to journal or take quizzes in the book, I would reccommend some of his other books. I hear great things about his original "facing the shadow" book. I kind of wish I had bought that one actually.

Dr. Carnes is a noted authority and perhaps the premier researcher in the area of sexual addiction. His work goes back easily some twenty years. I have studied with Dr. Carnes and I can say with some authority that this may be his finest work. It is the fruit of much thought and labor. It is reality. Carl Rogers said: "Until we can accept ourselves as we really are we can't change." This book, really a work book, helps the addicted person do just that. But it doesn't stop there. The addict is able to see through the work he does that he is able, through healthy activities, to regain control of his life. This is the second edition. Dr. Carnes demonstrates not only his high standards of authorship, but his humility and ability to accept constructive criticism both from within himself and I think perhaps others, in the changes he has put into this second edition. They are well worth the effort. Dr. Carnes comes at the sexual addiction issue with clarity, research, and above all empathy. His other work "The Recovery Zone," will I think prove to be as well received as this work.

Roger L. Johnson
M.A, Th.M. LPC
Director, Day Program
Meier Clinics

Key strategy- work to FINISH THINGS! Addicts do not finish things- prefer to "keep options open." Thrives in unfinished business. Starting more than you can finish leads to CRISIS. ENDING THINGS adds substantially to recovery. Addicts avoid completing their conversations. Important feelings and facts are not communicated. Conflict not resolved. PAIN ACCUMULATES. Increase PAIN AND COST TO STOP. Childhood needed something you didn't receive- trust, security, safety, non-sexual affection, both parents together. Normalcy. RESPONSIBILITY TO THOSE YOU HAVE HURT. NEGATIVE EMOTIONS ARE TRANSFERRED TO CHILDREN. Addictive sex feels shameful, illicit, stolen, exploitive, and joyless. Healthy sex- adds to self-esteem, is mutual, intimate, fun, and playful. Fighting= act of trust- focus on issues. - Give outcome to God. Horniness = loneliness. When in doubt, don't. Secrets will separate you from others in recovery. Get a pet. Avoid the feeling that you are a victim. Be gentle w/ yourself about old tortuous conflicts. They are not about you! They never were! Recovery= burst of creativity. NURTURING- Learning how to care for themselves and to allow others to care for them IS essential RECOVERY TASK. Intimacy= shared experiences! FIDELITY TO YOURSELF is the ultimate act of faithfulness to the other. Trust yourself. It's as hared for your partner as it is for you! Admit mistakes. Share Spirituality. Have fun together- common experiences. Recovery- brings awareness of abuse. Sustain from sex w/o intimacy. Talk before, during, and after. Compliment your partner. Respect boundaries. Pay attention to feelings. See Sex as a legitimate joy! Take care of your body. Express attraction. Work on friendship and companionship. Fast-forward the relationship. This is even closer to a cure. Other excellent points in II Corinthians; The Message.

Working through this with group therapy has been wonderful and life changing. Cannot recommend it highly enough. Get Carnes' other books as well.

FAMILY AND FRIENDS' GUIDE TO DOMESTIC VIOLENCE provides practical answers to identifying signs of domestic abuse and helping victims. Not only are signs of abuse pointed out, from unexplained injuries to psychological reactions, but chapters tell how to listen, talk and take action which will help a friend. From overcoming a victim's isolation and fears to bolstering ego and finding help, here's the place to turn first.

It has very good advice on how to deal with the situation. People will think you're a genius when you start telling them stuff from this book.

As far as I can tell, this lady is the #1 expert on domestic violence.

As both a survivor and a counselor, I realize how difficult it is to explain the intricacies of a domestic violence situation, let alone how to help. This book is the best I've found, and believe me I've read a lot of books on the subject. I read it and immediately passed it on to someone else who could benefit from reading it. If more people understood, the world would be a better place. Buy it, read it, pass it on.

Family and Friends Guide to Domestic Violence is an excellent book. It is written in simple understandable terms and gives hands on examples on how to help those in violent relationships. It also clearly explains some habits, and reasons for violence in relationships. The information is very straightforward, and honest. As an advocate working in a domestic violence shelter, I wish I had tons of these to hand out to families freely. I am impressed, and often refer this book to both colleages and families!

Information contained within was most helpful in reaching out to a friend who is in what I perceived to be an abusive marriage. It was easily read and made suggestions for me to be most effective in assisting my friend. I highly recommend the book - keep it on your shelf after you've read it - 1 in 5 women is in an abusive relationship.