Personal Books

This is an honest account of a facially disfigured man who has done lots more with his life than most "normal" men. Anyone who has ever been self-conscious about freckles, a big nose, extra weight or any "perceived" deformity, will feel a kinship with his self consciousness. I certainly did, yet I also felt gratitude that I did not have to go through what he went through. I laughed hard, I cried a few times and I came to some peace with myself after reading this personal little gem of a book, written by a gem of a man.

What a wonderful book this is, though I look at it more as a funny and poignant memoir of someone who has seemingly overcome tremendous obstacles to create a wholesome and very meaningful and happy life for himself. Through significant events in his past, David relates, with great humor, how he was able to overcome the society's burden of judging people by how they look and lead a very fulfilling life. There are some aspects of a "self-help" book about the text, but mostly it is the story of David. At the same time, I found myself looking inward quite a bit and reviewing my own choices in life. David does touch on some aspects of faith, especially in his Catholic upbringing, but the book is mostly about finding the true self within and creating strength and thriving. A warm, funny, touching and thoroughly enjoyable read. I recommend it for all.

If David Roche did not exist we would have to invent him. He is one of those people (and I'm beginning to think there may be more of them around than we imagine) who make this tired planet a better place to incarnate. David is a truth teller, hope giver, path finder, holy clown and, as we now discover, a hell of a good writer. I read the book in one sitting weeks ago and have been letting its stories and images percolate in my mind, heart and soul ever since. David is not a new-age pollyanna. He reminds me of Barack Obama -- whose memior I"m now reading -- in the way he has earned the authority of the one who has gone through the dark night of the soul and has come back to tell the tale. His compassion, optimism and salvific humor come from his willingness to work with his wounded parts. He takes the alchemical path, transforming the "base material" his life has given him into spiritual gold. In modeling, especially as a man in this society, this willingness to look unflinchingly into his own soul he performs an act of service. And love.

Jeff Roche
Communication Arts 610
March 6, 2008
Critical Analysis of The Church of 80% Sincerity
In reading David Roche's The Church of 80% Sincerity, I thought that I would be able to "kill two birds with one stone," simultaneously satisfying my curiosity/interest and sense of obligation as the author's nephew, as well finding an autobiographical text that I could examine with a critical lens. However, while I satisfied one part of the equation, I complicated the other; it's not easy to be critical of family.
But I digress. Roche's book is not truly an autobiography. This work is a testimonio, as it "represents an affirmation of the individual subject, even of individual growth and transformation, but in connection with a group or class situation marked by marginalization," (Couser 88). Still, this description is not entirely accurate, as Roche hardly mentions his connection to and development with a community of performers with disabilities (Roche 6). Yet, to quote Steven Winn off of davidroche.com, "what's most striking, and finally moving, is the way he both draws attention to his disfigurement and makes the audience see beyond it as well," fitting nicely with the first part of the testimonio definition. Thus, The Church of 80% Sincerity is more of a semi-autobiographical, non-linear novel that draws attention to Roche's poignant life stories/events that fit into his overall themes.
One might then ask, what are these overall themes? "It is the story of accepting yourself, despite all of your flaws," (Roche 5). By recounting various life experiences, Roche tells his tale of finding self-identity as a person with a congenital facial disfigurement and the setbacks that occurred at various stages. However, for Roche, humor is a key element in the telling of his story. According to Krefting, the use of humor affords her "the catharsis of laughing at myself and my insecurities, as well as allowing me a modality to criticize/satirize," (Krefting 110). I feel the same can be said of Roche. Humor is one part of Roche's identity, but his is an expansive identity that is inherently tied to his ability to "find my voice...I continue to find it onstage, in the pages of this book," (Roche, 56). In many ways, Roche's path of self-discovery aligns itself perfectly with Gill's description of the four types of integration.
The first type involves one's "assertion of a right to inclusion in society," (Gill 42). Roche has several examples related to such assertions. Whether it was his right to be politically active by voicing his concerns on city buses (Roche 64), or preferences for what he wants in a companion (Roche 101), Roche asserts his right to not be excluded on account of his disability.
The second type of integration relates to "finding a place" within the disability community (Gill 42). Roche's initial avoidance of disability culture can be explained by the factors that made him shameful of his own disability, desiring to be "normal". At home, the issue was not discussed; thus, Roche "never learned to explain myself. Instead I learned the safety of standing to the side," (Roche 34). This, combined with feeling rejected by the god that he was raised to love, led to Roche's (unsuccessful) attempts at passing, avoidance, and later substance abuse (Roche 38). Eventually, by finding "community, the feeling of mutual support and being in it together," (Roche 69), Roche felt empowered to challenge his shame and the oppression of others and stop "pretending to be normal and began to accept myself the way I was," (Roche 6).
Now, in a way this seems good because Roche finds strength in a supportive community. What is disconcerting is the lack of a challenge towards the concept of "normal." According to Lennard Davis, the "the idea of a norm is less a condition of human nature than it is a feature of a certain kind of society," (Davis, 24). Roche never directly questions the very notion of "normal," but rather, he continues to make several "normative" remarks throughout the book, leaving the societal construction of the norm untouched. The closest attempts came by asserting how everyone is unique and that Roche's experiences are "wholly human," (Roche 11). By using the word "normal" in this context, it implies that there is a poorly connoted "other," and there is something fundamentally wrong with a society that requires one to assert their humanity because they are viewed as "other."
"Coming together" is the third type of integration, where one recognizes their sameness and differences (Gill 43). The Church of 80% Sincerity does an excellent job of portraying this stage's classical struggle of self-acceptance. There is no need to repeat the why of the matter, for the same mental/physical barriers that prevented Roche from finding a place within the disability community, also prevented him from accepting himself. Though I criticized this quote in relation to the concept of "normal," it accurately shows the integration of sameness and differences: "My face is unique but my experiences are wholly human," (Roche 11).
"I thought...that my face was an impediment...Amazingly, that fear turned out not only to be unfounded, but also to be the opposite of the truth," (Roche 69). A statement such as this demonstrates that Roche was able to reach the fourth type of integration, "coming out," (Gill 45). Not only does Roche see and accept himself as whole, he takes pride in his appearance while using it for his advantage (performances, keynote speeches, charming himself).
The Church of 80% Sincerity extensively covers Roche's personal development in relation to disability, but he downplays any notion of "overcoming". Rather than stating that he overcame ill-formed patterns of thinking about himself and the world around, Roche discusses several self-transforming "moments of grace." While the lessons to be learned from these moments of grace are well-intended and not overlooked, one cannot help but to be distracted by the fact that self-transformations are "a matter of individual will and determination rather than of social and cultural accommodation," (Couser 80). The fact that Roche discusses matters with more of an introspective focus may cause one to overlook the larger sociocultural factors that helped create the ill-formed patterns of thinking in the first place. For example, a sociocultural model of disability might examine societal conceptions of beauty and the assumptions that are tied to it. However, by examining the "random acts of cruelty" that Roche encounters, such as the man who spit in his face, The Church of 80% Sincerity points out the inherent flaws in all of us (Roche 40). Although this does not directly challenge sociocultural factors, it is a step beyond the phenomenological level.
And yet it is difficult to be overly critical of these "moments of grace," because all of these individual, phenomenological experiences have led Roche to form the backbone of his "Church of 80% Sincerity." Although no physical church actually exists, the "Church of 80% Sincerity" can effectively be classified as a lifestyle choice/ way of thinking about the world. The Church is an abstraction "for recovering perfectionists, You can be 80% sincere 100% of the time, or you can be 100% sincere 80% of the time," (Roche 7). Many tenets of the Church are mentioned throughout the book, but the primary tenet would have to be one that calls for self-acceptance, despite one's flaws. One could argue that "The Church of 80% Sincerity" is a sub-set of disability culture, one could even go so far as to say the Church is disability culture. If one takes a look at Gill's work on the eight core values of disability culture (Gill 2-3), one would quickly see that the Church embraces the majority of these core values throughout the book, with a few additions of its own.
On a final note, Roche is very modest about being seen as an inspiration by others. Yet, it is in this modesty that Roche fails to acknowledge the fact that his high level of intelligence and incredible sense of humor assisted him in his identity development and ability to work though challenges; perhaps Roche is modest because of the fact that he was not always looked at as an inspiration, either by himself or others. Roche's work does a good job of challenging the notions of the theoretical gaze and stare, as well as the diagnostic gaze (Millet 26) by reiterating his own experiences with the Western model of medicine. Roche relates his early medical encounters, "One by one they came forward to examine me...If our eyes ever met, it was only a nanosecond before theirs turned away with easy, practiced avoidance," (Roche 53), "You never talk about feelings...or anything!" (Roche 54). This breakdown of the medical experience into feeling like a subject to be examined and gazed upon was a powerful one; stirring up emotions in the reader, as well as inciting Roche to action, as he later became an expert on the physician-patient relationship.
Ultimately, Roche and the "Church of 80% Sincerity" seem to align themselves with many of the core values of Disability Culture. Although one might choose to criticize Roche for his lack of social resolution, political agenda, or inherent call for change, one must realize that that is not what The Church of 80% Sincerity set out to do. This was a story of "courage, faith, inspiration, and laughter...to understand that you and I are very much alike, with our gifts and our flaws woven together," (Roche 11). The majority of the criticisms presented here were merely a means of expanding upon Roche's already solid foundation of self-love, tolerance, and an appreciation for the uniqueness of the human spirit.


Works Cited

Couser, Thomas G. "Conflicting Paradigms: The Rhetorics of Disability Memoir." Embodied Rhetorics Disability in Language and Culture. Ed. James C. Wilson and Cynthia Lewiecki-Wilson. Southern Illinois University Press, 2001. 78-91.

Davis, Lennard. Enforcing Normalcy: Disability, Deafness, and the Body. London: Verso, 1995. 1-49

Gill, Carol J. "A Psychological View of Disability Culture." First published in Disability Studies Quarterly, Fall 1995. www.independentliving.org/docs3/gill1995


Gill, Carol J. "Four Types of Integration in Disability Identity Development." Journal of Vocational Rehabilitation 9 (1997): 39-46.
Krefting, Rebecca. "'The Taming of the Sun': Finding the Joke in the Cancer Narrative of a Pedagogue." Disability and the Teaching of Writing A Critical Sourcebook. Ed. Cynthia Lewiecki-Wilson and Brenda Jo Brueggemann. Bedford/ St. Martin's: Boston, 2008. 109-116.

Millet, Ann. "Disarming Venus: Disability and the Re-Vision of Art History." FemTAP (Summer 2006): 21-39.

Roche, David. The Church of 80% Sincerity. New York: Perigee, 2008.

My wife, Wilene, and I saw David Roche perform THE CHURCH OF 80% SINCERITY on stage in 1996. It had rocked us with laughter and moved us to silence. When we finally spoke, I said to her, "He should write a book!" Now that didn't qualify me to be a prophet in his church, but it did make me a proud parishioner, because now that his message is out in print, everyone has access to Reverend Dave's gospel. And, that is a blessing!

David was born facially disfigured and I will say no more about that, because whatever I could possibly write, it would pale before David's words as he chronicles his life in this magnificent little book. I have known David for about fifteen years and what I love about the CHURCH OF 80% SINCERITY is the very thing that I love about him. It is about the place where he lives, the intersection of pathos wisdom and humor. When reading it, one is never a sentence or two away from the integration of these three forces.

Another potent and enchanting aspect of his writing lies in his ability to pilot the reader down the same road he is travelling. As David allows us to examine the grief,anger,love,and joy of his life, we are simultaneously compelled to examine and reexperience our own. Ultimately, what the book reveals is that David's journey has been been an alchemical one. We become very clear that he turns lead into gold, and there in lies the gospel; the good news that we can do the same. -- at least eighty percent of the time! -- I can't recommend it enough!

One of the very special merits of Dr. Newton's "Complete Conduct Principles for the 21st Century" is strict logic, being revealed throughout the whole book. This merit makes the sentences of the book reasonable and precise.

I especially like the Principle of "Lasting" (# 103): "A real friendship should not fade as time passes, and should not weaken because of space separation." What a beautiful and respectable mind! Few friendships have ever attained that. I hope our human beings will be improved by this great book.

Reading the book increases my hope of a better world in this century, which sadly begins with a dark side. May more people read it!

How nice it is! If one wishes to make his or her
life smoother and happier and do whatever he or
she likes without making others unpleasant, this
is a book he or she needs to read.

I agree:
How to make the world peaceful and better --
The solution can be found in Dr. John Newton's "Complete Conduct Principles for the 21st Century". This is what people in the whole world need, especially now.

At age 45, after considering I've been in the driver seat of my life for the last 14 years provided many opportunities to at the very least give up whining about my circumstances, and on the brighter side recognize my capacity to create, lovelier things. The essay's written by Steve Roberts, however, broadened my perspective even further. Distinguishing power as an ability to be resilient in the face of any eventuality opened my heart to endless possibilities. I have been most struck by the simplicity of experiencing "Love", & "Being Loving", as perhaps an ultimate goal along with listening to my heart. Moreover, owning that I am the knower in my life. With gratitude and deep appreciation I thank you Steve, for sharing your life and your wisdom. I recommend your book often usually followed with a desire to know how it was for them.

Reading this book is like spending time with a dear friend, in the truest sense of the word friend, meaning someone who brings out the best in you. I was entertained, educated and touched by all I read and experienced in reading Cool Mind, Warm Heart. Each time I set the book down I was changed, and I saw the world through fresh eyes. Whoever you are you will love it.

This wonderful book becomes a subtle yet pervasive presence in the reader's life. To experience life through Steve's eyes is like having a still small voice, a Howard Cosells on your shoulder whispering, "You're so much more than you think; there is so much more than you see. Look at it this way, from this angle, over here..."

Reading these candidly written stories, I am invited to consider in ever deeper ways the perspective that everything, every unexpected change offers opportunity to become more than I've considered before. One moment I am reading a story of a man's relationship with his mother who has Alzheimer's or the Swami he met at 8 or his love of wrestling Vermont stones into sculpture, and the next I am wondering why I would choose anything less than love as a response to life. It is like walking in the woods and suddenly glimpsing a grand buck through the trees: I glimpse the greatness I am capable of if I will choose it.

Cool Mind Warm Heart doesn't stay on the pages; it calls my truest self forward, and increases my confidence to be that. I invite you to enjoy the extraordinarily ordinary moments Steve celebrates in his stories.

This is one of the rare books whose stories I "watch" as my eyes move across the written words. So much more than a lovely read, Cool Mind Warm Heart is fully entertaining and compelling. My heart danced from beginning to end!

Cool Mind Warm Heart is a grand adventure in asking the question, "Who am I committed to being beyond all else in life?" Each essay is a delicious piece of honesty and contains the purity of spirit that provides the reader an opportunity to consider life from the vantage of our greatness, not our limitations. Steve Roberts' ability to convey the simplicity of the human spirit is a breath of fresh air, especially in those moments when one feels as though they are gasping for a breath. This book will cause you to consider the vantage from which you view all life and begin to ask your own pointed and poignant questions about what motivates you to do the things you do. And above all else, this book will cause you to smile and laugh out loud!
Kenda Stewart

I am a clinical therapist and use this book to inspire adolescent and young adult women in their journey! This entire trilogy is priceless for anyone who is interested in being blessed by watching another soul "unfold" and take flight! I love hearing about Oriah's metamorphasis... i can see her "grow up" throughout her trilogy! Watching her go full circle in her discoveries touches my heart and inspires my soul. She is human and she is courageous enough to share her story. I recommend you read all three... The Invitation, The Dance and The Call. Thank you Oriah!

Within the pages of this beautiful little book, the reader finds magic, truth, beauty and healing.

As an author, Chinese Medicine & Healthy Weight Management, and healer, I recommend this book highly to my patients and friends, as well as to you.

In the world of self-help books, the message is often variations of the same thing - work harder to improve yourself; be kinder; be more loving; focus your attention; change, change, change.
The Dance is quite different. Oriah asks you, "What if there is no need to change, no need to try and transform yourself into someone who is more compassionate, more present, more loving or wise? How would this affect all the places in your life where you are endlessly trying to be better?"
I really loved this book because it encourages the reader to just be who they are, because who they are is just fine. It's not that the author doesn't believe in the power of change, rather she promotes the idea that the moment we let go of our need to become "better," then everything in life will simply unfold as it should.
What I especially liked about this book was Oriah's down-to-earth manner of writing. Unlike so many other authors of the same genre, she doesn't pretend to have all the answers - in fact, she is rather self-deprecating. She gives examples in her life where she really did screw up, but I think that this makes her message more meaningful, and a whole lot more human.




Zara Stevens
Boy Meets Girl: A Pocketful of Wedding Stories

Words themselves can become acts of beauty that awaken and strengthen our commitment to living our soul's desires. ~Oriah Mountain Dreamer

Oriah Mountain Dreamer blends daily existence with spiritual insight. She survived a violent marriage, chronic fatigue and living almost next door to her ex husband when he remarried. Her life is a study in patience, emotional turmoil resolved and survival of the most open heart.

The start of the book contains a poem and then each chapter is an expanded vision of the elements contained in a part of the poem. After the poem, Oriah dives right into a retelling of her life, the conflicts she has experienced and how as a spiritual teacher, she too struggles to maintain emotional equilibrium. There is a subtle comfort in knowing that if Oriah can survive her life, then we can too.

This is the beauty mingled with the various stunning insights Oriah has while trying to unburden her heart and pull us out on the dance floor of life. She loves to read and a number of the books she mentioned where books I had just recently read. She quotes Rainer Maria Rilke and Rumi. She discusses Daniel Ladinsky's translations of Hafiz. Her "headed for home" comments made me think of Kahlil Gibran's The Prophet.

Throughout this work Oriah focuses on connecting, serenity, joy, an authentic lifestyle, living with passion, retaining energy and focus, being honest and finding happiness within the complex. She also provides meditations on worthiness, surrender, slowing down and letting go.

This is not a five-step or a ten-step program, it is more an unfolding of experience through an exploration of Oriah's life experience. She has struggled, she has survived. She also knows there are no quick fixes and that many self-help programs are no match for real-life situations. Sometimes there is no easy way out of the pain and you have to endure heartache to learn your greatest lessons.

"Take me to the places on the earth that teach you how to dance,
the places where you can risk letting the world break your heart,
and I will take you to the places where the earth beneath my feet
and the stars overhead make my heart whole again and again."
~ Oriah Mountain Dreamer

What did I love most about this book? The section where she talks about her ultimate fantasy of reading in bed with the man she loves. Yes, this book is mostly about Oriah, or the people she has met throughout her life, but the way she draws on her inner wisdom is by experiencing life and dancing with difficulty.

~The Rebecca Review

The Dance is a great book. I enjoyed it from the first page to the last. Oriah is not just a writer; she is an artist, with a new perspective on life, and on events. Her thoughts flow smoothly, as if you were reading something you wrote, or something you already knew to be true. I am going to say it again, she is an artist.

Some parts of the book, you won't help but read out loud to someone you care for. I did that with my mother, and some other times with a friend of mine. Both of them want to borrow the book.

This book will help you dream, and here I will quote something from the author, as she wrote "To dream is to create the stories of how we live our lives, and these are the stories our children's children will remember. I write with as much honesty and frankness as I can, because I want to offer stories of being present with what is. I recite poetry when I speak, because I want offer beauty and the power of art to remind us of who and what we are. I share personal stories, because I want to cocreate a story of intimacy and cultivate our capacity for compassion in dealing with out human failings. I tell love stories because I want to learn how to love well." (p151)

I will buy The Call, and I know it will be as good as the Invitation and The Dance. And hopefully one day in the future I will make it to one of Oriah's retreats.

Sams is a profoundly gifted writer and spiritual teacher. I highly recommend this book to anyone on the spiritual path.

I believe this statement reflects Jamie's chief goal for this book: this statement is listed in the authors note, preceeding the text. I don't think it is possible to draw a universal map of consciousness applicable to all humans. The chief reason being is that some folks never get past the 1st commandment let alone rise to metaphysical heights described in the text. Further, unless the reader has more than a beginners background in the metaphysical - or enjoys flipping back and forth between the text and the glossary - the reading can be difficult.

I gave this book five stars for what it DOES do, and that is a whole lot more than 99% of the metaphysical works I have read:

It paints a picture of the onesness of all existence, even though most of existence sees itself as seperate from everything else;

It bashes the notion that only enlighted earthly masters can achieve spirituality;

It clearly describes the downfalls of anyone being overimpressed with their spiritual progress;

It provides healers with a strong dose of reality: not to forget that therapy patients come to you because they are sick...there is pressure in them staying sick so you can make money;

It confronts head on the notion that a healer can see oodles of people on end: a handful may be too many;

It rightfully makes warriors out of beings immersed in the waters of daily life and it's endless tortures and misfortunes;

It superbly raises these tribulations to the status of lessons, encouraging hope and joy in the struggle;

It clearly points out that transformation is not a linear process;

It describes this circular process as seven different paths: this description allows readers to compare, contrast, and analyze later;

It describes the first hand accounts of Jamie in her path of transformation;

Read the book for yourself: you can't put it down.

This book is easy to read, with sensible suggestions that can be incorporated into your life with relative ease.

Jamie Sams once again takes us on a journey through the layers of our spirit by bringing a complete understanding to the path we walk.

Sams book certainly provides the reader with much material to ponder. It's definitely not the type of book to be read in one sitting and it's not a real "page turner". Instead, the truths Ms. Sams explores are best digested slowly. Perhaps this is most appropriate since she is describing a spiritual journey that lasts a lifetime and more. The diagrams are helpful.

I found this a book insightful although very simplistic in writing style. It was helpful in giving other counselors a different way of looking at difficulties they have in some therapy sessions. Especially those clients that are stuck in one perspective and can not move off the safety square.

Written with sincere compassion, and a warm, direct tone, Thom Rutledge gives us permission to be human, and helps the reader see that having fears, or tendencies to avoid those situations which create fear, is not a basis for shame. Embracing Fear teaches the reader to transform maladaptive responses, into winning situations, and the importance of finding the gift, lesson or opportunity in challenges we face. With his honest style, he helps us find the reason and rational messages we can listen to within our being when facing difficult or frightening situations. This is a man who knows of what he writes. His knowledge, personal experience, and ability to convey that he truly cares makes him a uniquley therapeutic and helpful writer. The reader is left feeling nurtured all along the way, and yet skillfully challenged as well. Wendy Oliver-Pyatt, MD author: Fed Up! The Breakthrough Ten Step No-Diet Fitness Plan.

I like this book because of Thom's simple, down-to-earth language and his sharing from his own personal experiences. He helps us realize how pervasively and unconsciously fear operates in our lives. His viewing fear as normal, rather than the result of personal weaknesses, enables us to see ourselves as struggling, growing and traveling together with him and others, not set apart and different. He has a safe, inviting approach to dealing with the Bullies, as he calls our fears. I believe, without exception, those who want to live their lives to the fullest will benefit from Thom's perspective and the steps to being in charge of fear. He holds our hand and convincingly shows us page by page.

*****
This book is a great read all about fear. Specifically, it is about embracing fear---facing fear---rather than running from it, stuffing it, etc. Unlike most self-help books, the author does not presume to be an authority with easy answers; instead, he is a fellow human being who struggles with his own fear and that of his clients. He shares very practical techniques to approach your fears so that you can still have the life you want, regardless of your fears.

Fear underlies most if all negative emotions. I found this book to be very helpful. The author asks many helpful questions such as "What would I do today if I were brave?"...leading me to see where my fears stopped me.

Another technique he uses is splitting our self-talk into the negative voices of unhealthy unnecessary fear (which he calls The Bully) and the positive voices of what we know with our heads and hearts (which he calls The Ally). This has been really helpful to me, too. He makes the point that we will never rid ourselves of fear, but we will be less and less bothered by it as we learn how to face it.

This book differs from an ordinary self-help book in that it is amazingly useful, plus the author is practical, transparent, realistic, and humble. I loved reading it, highlighted it all over the place, and will read it again.

It is an excellent value and worth hours of therapy. I would even suggest it in lieu of therapy! I immediately bought two copies to send to two of my closest friends.
*****

This book will challenge you to look fear in the face and walk right though it! On the other side of fear is Love. If you want more love in your life. . . read this book!

PRAISING THIS BOOK IS AS ABSURD AS TRYING TO FIND YOURSELF IN THE WORLD.. SO LETS NOT PRAISE IT.. JUST READ IT AND ABOVE ALL, LIVE IT¡¡¡¡¡

Adya is a great communicator of truth. His message truly delivers with so much patience and humor. He will lead you to the doorway. Caution! Once you have entered that door don't be disappointed to find yourself still doing the dishes.

[...]

It's hard to put it into words, there's just something unique about his teachings. He doesn't talk endlessly about koans or sitting like most Zen books. He describes the craziest experiences but emphasizes that the only good thing about spiritual experiences are to find what awakening isn't. He also says that you don't get a thing 'you' want when awakening. He speaks of awakening as enlightenment like experiences and also moment to moment work, thus seeming to go between both popular schools of Japanese Zen. He has an awareness of western and Hindu mysticism also, but keeps coming back to Zen of course. So he is not some sort of integrative teacher, although I had the unfortunate experience of finding one of his books in the new age section of a book store.
I believe he recieved transmission from a Soto teacher.
Recommended for any Zen student or any mystic whatsoever.

Brilliant writing doesn't lie in how profound the terms are, but rather, in the simplicity that the unfathomably profound can be expressed in. Adyashanti is gifted with the ability to accomplish the task. The light that every chapter is able to shine upon the mind is put into terminology and sentence structure so simple that any individual will be able to allow the meaning behind the words immediately have an affect on them. So simplified, so wise.

Watch Video Here: http://www.amazon.com/review/R2K90J6J1VNKGL Please enjopy my video review of Emptiness Dancing. Mark Waller author of Awakening: Exposing the Voice of the Mosaic Mind

As I write this there are 20 reviews of this book on the Amazon website, all good. I have nothing to add about their comments regarding this book; it gets right to the heart of the subject.

The book, however, suffers from something I call "random comma disease." The author (or editor?) likes to put commas in inappropriate places in sentences: "Now, is a good time to develop a more loving connection with yourself" (p. 99), or "Accepting responsiblity for what happens in our lives, gives us a lot of freedom and more control, than when we look for someone to blame" (p. 54). Occasionally the odd misplaced semi-colon creeps in as well: "As you gain clarity on what a positive relationship means to you; you will attract it easily" (p. 95).

Surely a conscientous proof-reader could have caught these errors before the book went to press.

Jeanette Castelli self-help book cuts through the long term recovery from breakups and gives the straight bottomline steps to get on with your life.
This is not a quick fix book nor a thesis in human behavior, it is just the right dosage of reality check and inner work. Extreme Breakup Recovery is a shortcut that works when it comes to getting over pain and moving on after breaking up.

As a man, I was surprised how far I fell from grace when a four year relationship with a woman that pushed me to "get married" suddenly and unexpectedly decided to "break-up", after I agreed to "get married"... Huh? My Hearty was broken and my head was all messed-up! This book really helped me start moving on "head and heart" from the beginning... no typical "girly" perspectives or "PMS" excuses. Straight forward, workbook style that leads the way to gettting the job done and openning the door to move on...which I have in a positive manner! Thank you!

In this book I found the way to move on. I was very hopless and thinking that it would take me a long time to feel good again. After reading Extreme Breakup Recovery, I could move on. Actually, after the first few chapters, I was already able to function. Now I have moved on, learned a lot and I am getting ready for a new more positive relationship.

I read about this book in Cosmopolitan April article "The new way to get over a guy" and I bought the book.

It is an easy read, full of wise and practical advice to understand and heal the heavy emotions after a breakup and stop the pain. Also it shows you how to find and learn the lessons from the relationship, develop more self-esteem and move on.

Excellent and really helps !!

Easy to read, descriptive and well written. This book offers a few fascinating accounts along with a touch of Vietnamese history and language translation as it pertained to the author in his stories. It was a book that I did not want to end, seeking more of his accounts. My initial thought after completing the last page was "this guy has got to do another book". Of course that's easy for me to say as I sat reading in comfort within my screened-in patio sipping home made cherry wine, for I am not the one reliving and writing.Semper Fidelis.

This book tell the real story, of the daily routines of a Grunt/ Infantryman in Nam. No glamorizing/glorifications.

While I have the utmost respect for the service of Mr. Delezen and the constant dangers that he and his teammates faced, I didn't really enjoy his writing style, which appeared to be very philosophical and lacked a great amount of detail. It almost seemed to be written in the third person with an effort to explain the emotional and psychological gyrations of a combat soldier.

It is obvious that this person lacks any ability to fairly provide critique for any work of literature. His remarkes that Eye of the Tiger does not suit his personal tastes are quite biased..perhaps a bit predjudiced. The book is everything that the reviewer did not like and it is these very qualities that have turned it into a best seller. I decided to research the critic and found that he has no credentials what so ever and this is merely his second review; perhaps a bit over his head to say the least. I think that he will realize that his opinion is not of any value judgeing by the votes cast by other readers. It is not fair that these "hatchet weilders" are allowed to voice an opinion when they lack the ability to articulate on anything but "Ramboesque" novels.
This was a review that came from a person that lacks the knowledge or ability to present artistic dialog, in short he jumped in over his head and now his reputation will be ruined...there are many people upset over this blast of such a wonderful piece of literature. I would advise the reviewer that stated "Yawner" to take some creative writing classes at his local community college; this is perhaps the worst review I have seen thus far on Amazon. I am surprised that it was allowed to be posted... he is finished.

Eye of the Tiger is incredible. Every time I read it I am transported back to Viet Nam. It is the summer of 1967 and I am again humping a pack in the DMZ, searching for the North Vietnamese Army. I can feel the sweltering heat and taste my sweat as I slowly and gently push aside the next little bit of jungle with my left hand, eyes constantly moving in a sideways figure 8 pattern searching for color, shape, movement, anything that does not belong, searching, searching. We've heard chopping all morning. Is that log the corner of a bunker? What's that smell? Did one of our guys fart or one of theirs? Which way is the wind moving? M-16 in my right hand, stock clamped between bicep and side, finger on trigger, thumb on safety, trusting from experience my subconscious will recognize the next deadly threat and, I will without thinking simultaneously flick the safety to full auto and pull the trigger a fraction of a second faster than he does, killing him before he kills me. Nothing exists but this moment.

Delezen paints word pictures that are so incredibly powerful that I am mesmerized, transformed, taken aback and admit to myself, yes, this is what it was like, this is real. I know it is real because I was his pointman in 3d Force Recon team Spiceberry One. Thank you for telling it your way, Eddie.

I enjoyed this book so much that I read it twice,
then a year later, read it again!!---FANTASTIC!!
It captures the times, the people, places and things that
made Sylvester, San Francisco, that music and that era
such a golden & magical time!
I love the stories of the young Sylvester growing up in
South Central L.A. in the 50's and 60's, FLAMING THE CHILDREN!!
Giving them fabulousness and outrageousness at every turn,
from his soul-stirring falsetto rendition of the black gospel
classic "Never Grow Old", to the rawkus "DISQUOTAYS", a rag-tag
gang of young black drag queens that he hung out with, to the
off-the-charts outfits that must've stopped traffic in
the hood big time! (LOL!!)
It was evident to all who knew him even then, that this
pretty black child with the high voice was way different
and way way special!! (-:

Some didn't know how to take Sylvester or even know what to
do with him, yet he pressed on!---Carving out his own space
within the harsh realities of ghetto life as best he could.
Sylvester was a true pioneer in every way!
He didn't see race, gender, the expectations of others,
the taunts of hateful & ignorant people, etc.,
as obstacles or boundaries he needed to respect.
He was a true original!--Uncut, undiluted, young, black,
gay, gifted, stylish, full of charm and ambition,
with the soul of a torch singer or a blues shouter
infused by a rock-n-roll rebel spirit and soul singer's chops!
What a combination!
I myself can attest to Sylvester's impact, as both a fan
and as young gay black kid who was coming of age and into
self-awareness at the very time that his star was reaching it's zenith!
I had just started partying and experimenting sexually by
the age of 14 in 1978 when "Dance (Disco Heat)" and
"You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real!)" burst onto the music charts,
in the clubs and in house parties across the country
and eventually, the world!
I couldn't yet get into the disco clubs, but oh boy!--
I could sure get into house parties!
I was hanging out with people who were 5 to 10 yrs older
than me and I was learning MANY INTERESTING THINGS!!
Of course, back then you had "FAIRY GODMUTHAZ", older gays
who would take us young "up & comings" under their chiffon wings
and school us on the do's and don't's of gay life, sex & survival
in the late 70's and early 80's!!
PRE-AIDS and in the last writhing throws of the SEXUAL REVOLUTION,
it was a great time to be alive!
I grew up in the south during this time, which already had
it's issues with race and sexuality, so the gay world of that time,
on that end of the country, was very still underground,
hypocritcal and always hush-hush!!
There were a lot of secret stares, codes, slangs, etc.
to let those who needed to know, what you wanted them to know.
But though it was very repressed and subterfuge,
MAN, DID WE HAVE SOME FUN TIMES IN OUR LITTLE NETHERWORLD!!
And yes, as is now, back then, straight men did venture
into our world quite frequently!!

Anywayz, enter THE FABULOUS SYLVESTER from the legendary
and exotically far reaches of a city they called
"the gay shangri-la"...aka SAN FRANCISCO!!
It was the summer of 1978, and here was this strong,
proud, black, beautiful, talented, androgynous gay man
telling us, by the very nature of his exsistence,
that it was not only alright to be what you were out
in full view of the world, but it was also our duty
to be FABULOUS & JOYOUS!! (-:
Sylvester was more than just a disco diva,
HE WAS A WHOLE MOVEMENT!!--Every time he would perform,
it was part church revival, part circus, part drag pageant
and part gay pride celebration!!

TRUE STORY!!---Picture It!!--Greenville, SC in May of 1979...
I had just turned 15 yrs old, and me and two young gay freinds
of mine, one 16 and one 18, hear through the grapevine
that none other than THE FABULOUS SYLVESTER would be appearing
at a club called SAN SOUCCI's in Atlanta, GA
(which was 200+ miles way, and well on it's way to becoming
the southern San Francisco!) and we go absolutely nuts!
It becomes our mission, our sole purpose for exsisting!!
Our quest, to somehow, obtain fake ID's, fabulous disco-era
outfits replete with lots of glitter, dripping foxtails
off the lapels & double belts, shoes called "crayons"
that had a clear amber heel that had lights in them that
blinked in rhythm as you danced your booty off on the dance
floor, either Sassoon or Jordache jeans which had a little
stretch fabric blended in with the denim to hug your firm
perky teen-aged azz and tiny waist to perfection,
outlining your package in the front, and making
the local guys salivate with lust over a hot piece
of TENDERONI like you! (LOL!!--we were too much!)

We pooled our allowances, our summer jobs, etc. to
obtain tickets through an older bisexual cousin of mine
who lived down in Atlanta at the time, who also arranged
the fake ID's as well.
Keep in mind, I had just turned 15, one freind was 16
and the other was 18...none of our parents even knew
we were gay, and there was no way in the hell
that they would've sanctioned us (under-aged)
going all that way to Atlanta...and to see this
gender-inspecific weirdo named SYLVESTER!!
(Boy George and Ru Paul were still a ways off yet!)

So me and my freinds, being rife with teenaged angst,
secretiveness and resourcefulness, concoct the half-baked
scheme to hitchhike from Greenville to Atlanta with duffle
bags in tow filled with our outfits, toiletries, etc.,
use our fake ID's to get into the club and party with
Sylvester & Two Tons O' Fun into the wee hours,
get my older bi cousin to rent us a hotel room in Atlanta,
have us a slam bang good time with some local fellaz
overnight and then hitch it back to Greenville by Sunday
evening before 5 pm!! (LMAO!!)

Anywayz, long story short, as is with all half-cocked
and scantily thought out teenaged schemes, we did pull it off,
got in the club and got down with Sylvester, got high,
got the boys, got the hotel room, etc.
But what we didn't bargain on was our mothers not being born
yesterday and the lose lips of the jealous young queens
who wished they had the balls to pull off what we did!
(We got ratted out big time!)
We also had a hell of a time trying to hitch it back
from Atlanta to Greenville on a Sunday morning, and after
our mothers up in SC found out what we had done,
they got in a car and headed for us like heat-seeking/
search & destroy SCUD missles with fire in their eyes!
Man, did we get our teenage closeted gay behinds handed to us!
My older cousin caught it too from my uncle in Atlanta
for his hand in our scheme, and we didn't even have
time to put concealer on over the many "hickies" on our
necks and chests from our Atlanta frollick in the hotel
from the night before! Boy, it was a mess!
We wound up being forced out of the closet to our mothers
(which was then a horror to them!)
We were all immediately grounded for a month to our respective
residences, were banned from socializing with each other,
(which we still would sneak and hang out!)and we all got
the butt whippings of our young lives!
(Yes, parents still whipped butt back in those days!)
BUT OH MAN!--We didn't care!
It was well worth it, because we got to see THE GODDESS,
THE DISCO DIVA...SYLVESTER, live and upclose!! (LOL!!)

Now, here I sit...a 44 yr old, well-traveled, successful,
proud and fortunate gay black man who has had my fun,
relished the memories of those far away magical days,
and if there is any bittersweetness to the story,
it's that I have outlived not only my two freinds from
that teenaged excursion, but Sylvester and about 30 more
freinds and acquaintances from the late 70's
to the mid 90's...all lost to the scourge of AIDS.
As we grow older, we reflect and long for things that
were familiar to our particular generation as things are
being torn down, people die or move, and the world of
our past is erased. This wonderful book, along with
Sylvester's music playing in the background as I was
reading it, brought all the magic back for awhile!
This book would make an excellent movie and I hope someone
will make it happen someday in the near future.
In the meantime, enjoy the book folks!
R.I.P. To Sylvester, Izora Rhodes, Patrick Cowley,
and to all my freinds and acquaintances who have made
their transitions in the prime of their lives!--
I'll see you again one day!!
LOVE & PEACE 2 ALL!!

I am still reading the book and have been quite pleased with all the details of Mr Sylvester James Jr. Life, I am sure when a read the final pages it will be as smashing as the life he lived!! I also found a DVD, Filmed in San Francisco, in 1985 or 1987 when he celebrated his birthday, the video is grainy and not what I expected which was Him and the Famous (Two Tons of Fun,) what I have is Sylvester in his what I call break out years his voice was not as vibrant during this period but to have anything of him suits me just fine. He came into his own he perfected his voice and character, I still miss his presence on earth just as I do all the Great Ones.

Sincerely,
LEE

At last, a beautifully-written book about a beautiful artist - Sylvester. I have been waiting for this book to arrive for years and, finally, here it is!

I was hooked by the opening chapter which tells the story of a young boy named Tiki Lofton who sneaks out of his bedroom window at night and over to a friend's apartment where, in 1960's South Central, with the help of a young Sylvester, he transforms himself into a "Disquotay." The Disquotays were a group of boys who liked to dress up as sophisticated ladies. And Sylvester, or Dooni as he was known then, was in charge of the wigs.

"The first Disquotay bash that Tiki went to was over on 120th and Athens, at Etta James's house, sometime around 1965. Etta, who would later be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (largely on the strength of her 1961 hit "At Last") and the Betty Ford Center (largely on the strength of her smack addiction), was already a recording star and a friend to many local Los Angeles drag queens . . . The house, with its swimming pool and fireplace, had stunned her. Women, drag queens, and guys, all sending joyful noises in Tiki's direction; the music had been jumping; Walter Jackson's version of "Lee Cross," Jr. Walker & the All Stars' "Shotgun," "Nowhere to Run" by Martha and the Vandellas, Fontella Bass singing "Rescue Me." Gay kids all perched on gigantic speakers, singing and carrying on . . . Tiki had said to herself. "This -- honey, where is this world?" Within months, she would be a full-fledged Disquotay, made-up, bewigged, bejeweled."

Joshua Gamsom recreates this world vividly in that first chapter. Simultaneously, he introduces us to the members of Sylvester's family. His beautiful and beloved mother and grandmother. His twin sisters, Dette and Dean. The quotes are full of heart and expertly placed and the story unfolds like a fine silk fan. I can't help but think that Sylvester would be very pleased to read this biography.

I had the honor of meeting with Sylvester to discuss a project a few years before his death. It was mid-afternoon and he was sewing sequins on something, which was his favorite pasttime. He was always sewing, a talent he picked up from the women who raised him. He walked over to the turntable and put on Patti LaBelle's "If Only You Knew" and said he was dedicating the song at his One-Night-Only concert the following night to his fans and supporters in San Francisco, the city in which he always felt most at home. That night, with Martha Wash at his side, they performed that song together, bouncing their voices off each other inside the Castro Theater. Those two powerful voices, the acoustics of the Castro Theater, and the magical spell he wove with Patti LaBelle's song was something to behold.

That Sylvester could hold his own with the amazing Martha Wash is a testament to the power of his falsetto. He didn't have a thin, reedy falsetto. His was full-bodied, gravelly even, and very much in evidence on one of his biggest hits, "Do You Wanna Funk."

"So when I tell you, that you're really something, baby, will you stay, or will you go away."

Joshua Gamson captures the essence of Sylvester's personality, the diva fits as well as the immense kindness and sensitivity, and wraps it all together into an highly readable book that I wholeheartedly suggest you pick up. Although some have faulted him for not having an encyclopedic knowledge of music, Gamson lets experts like Joel Selvin provide insightful commentary.

It is my hope that someone has optioned the book for a movie and we can expect to see this wild individual portrayed in all his glory.

John Waters wraps up "The Fabulous Sylvester" pretty well in his cover blurb: "A well-written, touching, dignified biography of a gay black diva who never really fit into any minority but managed to achieve his dreams of stardom. Now that's what I call a man."

Five Stars. Great Read.

The Fabulous Sylvester is a fascinating recounting of the life of Sylvester, the dance scene and Sylvester's career. This book explores the life of Sylvester from his early childhood days to his development into an international dance icon. This book does not sugarcoat any part of Sylvester's life. It is detailed and honest and shows us all aspects of his life and career. This book is as interesting and fabulous as Sylvester was.

this Book was on right on time. Sylvester was something else back in the day as a artist and very Open about his sexuality. He didn't back down from anything. His voice was the truth and very soulful. this Book explores his whole career and thensome and the many other artists he encountered and how important they were,etc... this book takes you back to a time period when so much was happening. a must read and it is very well written and is a real page turner.